


Elide's Healing

by dreamingofthis



Category: Throne of Glass Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: Angst, Canon Continuation, Fluff, Friendship, Healing, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-27
Updated: 2020-11-23
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:16:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 37,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26140981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamingofthis/pseuds/dreamingofthis
Summary: Post-KOS. Elide decides it's time to begin the healing process now that she is settled at Perranth with Lorcan. The city is rebuilding, and Elide wants to grow with her beloved city. In three weeks she plans to have her ankle healed and to become literate. Old traumas are brought to light, but luckily she is surrounded by supportive friends and court members.
Relationships: Aelin Ashryver Galathynius | Celaena Sardothien/Rowan Whitethorn, Chaol Westfall/Yrene, Elide Lochan/Lorcan Salvaterre
Comments: 19
Kudos: 87





	1. Chapter 1

It had been four months since the liberation of Terrasan, and Elide was eager to begin rebuilding Perranth. The city had been ransacked, though she was happy to see the slow and steady recovery efforts. Lorcan had done more work than anyone had anticipated. Most of the citizens were still cautious of him, but he soon developed a reputation as someone who would do any job you asked of him. Elide loved this because it meant on any given day she could asked around the city for his whereabouts and then find him shirtless, sweaty, and hauling something heavy.

She didn’t love that she was often not alone in her gawking but found it in herself to forgive the other lusting citizens. At least she would have something in common with many of the folks she governed.

When Lorcan eventually spotted his wife, he would give her a smile that often sent a collective sigh through the people around her. She would return the smile and lift the baskets she was offering full of food and watering to him and whoever he was helping that day. It was her way of helping these efforts. Though, she often wished she could do more.

Plenty of the women of Perranth assisted with physical labor, everyone pulling their weight in the efforts. While Elide and the children worked on simpler tasks, delivering food, sweeping up debris, fetching tools as needed. Lorcan told her she was playing a great role just by stepping outside of the castle. She inspired the workers, and pushed everyone forward in the efforts.

She still frowned at her twisted ankle that ached more and more with every step. It seemed that without the adrenaline of survival on her side, her ankle was more prone to ache and swell. She could be doing so much more if her ankle was healed. It could be healed. Yrene had told her as much, and though the pain would be great it would prevent worse damage in the future.

Elide sifted through these thoughts night after night. They’d been home for three months, the city was shaping up very well, and despite his exhaustion Lorcan made time to massage her ankle after it had soaked every night.

She watched him go through the motions, tiny circles where bone met bone, then steady strokes up her sore tendons. His hair was damp from their bath and hung around his face as he bent over Elide’s ankle.

“I’ve decided.” Elide announced.

“Decided what?” He asked, almost dreamily. Gods he needed to sleep, not waste time on her broken ankle.

“That I’m going to have my ankle healed.” Lorcan’s hands stopped for half of a second, then continued just as dutifully as before. “Does that surprise you?”

He put her foot down, giving her his full attention. “The decision to do it _now_ does.”

Elide nodded in silent agreement. This wasn’t the first time they’d discussed the process. It usually ended with Elide deciding to wait. Three weeks was a long time to be indisposed when the recovery efforts were still fragile. Not to mention the amount of pain she would experience. She went back and forth on if she was ready to relive her past through this pain.

“I think it’s best if I do it sooner rather than later.” Elide resolved. “Yrene already said I was causing myself further injury by walking on the ankle. And, I am done with receiving looks of pity when people see their lady struggled to walk from one end of the castle to the next. I have never been ashamed of my injury. I helped bring victory to this country on this damn ankle, but now that there is peace. I should take steps to put the past in the past. Including this injury.”

Lorcan’s eyes were misty, either from a need to sleep or her speech. Either way, Elide took his hand, still coated in the salve.

Confidently he told her, “I stand by your decision. If you’ll have me, I’ll stand by you during the entire process.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way. Though, I think you should continue to help rebuild. The city needs at least one of their leaders to still be active in the efforts.”

“We’ll discuss it with Yrene. She will likely have a schedule for the healing, so I can work mine around it.” Lorcan stood up, their hands still intertwined. “Let’s write her now, so it can be sent out first thing tomorrow.”

Lorcan gave her hand a final squeeze, then went to the desk and began the letter.

Elide bit her lip. “That is something else I want to work on, since I’ll be bed ridden for three weeks.”

Lorcan looked perplexed for a moment, then understood. In the weeks they had been home Elide had managed to hide her illiteracy from everyone by saving any correspondence or contracts for when Lorcan was able to help her. Several times she tucked the papers in the basket with his lunch, and he read them aloud to her, then wrote any replies she needed. Lorcan had attempted to teach her many times, but their time alone together was spare and the lessons too far apart for Elide to retain much.

Elide continued, “I’d like to hire a private tutor. Not that you weren’t fantastic, Lorcan, but you will be busy and it may be more efficient to have a professional for this job.”

Lorcan pulled out a second piece of paper, his expression proud enough to make Elide feel confident in her decision. She knew that she needed to learn how to read so she could lead properly, or even be a proper member of Aelin’s court.

Elide looked at the stack of books being quickly buried in papers on her desk. They were the gifts from Aelin, some of her favorites that she wanted Elide to read so they could discuss them. Lysandra had a matching stack, but the other lady was slowly working through them and had a two-book head start on Elide. She needed to catch up or else be exposed.

“One letter to Yrene, and one to the librarian to find you a tutor on literature.” Lorcan dipped his pen in ink and began. “We’ll phrase it discretely, but once the tutor arrives we can explain.”

Elide nodded. She was already imagining her future with all of these changes. She’ll no longer walk beside Lorcan and wonder if the pain is too bad she needs him to carry her. That stack of books will disappear—then likely reform with new titles from Aelin—and she can partake in the joy the queen finds in these items. Then, a new set of thoughts entered her head.

The images made her heart flutter and her stomach turn. She did some quick math, but the hope she felt in those images banished any disappointment she felt. Lorcan brought the two letters to Elide with a thin slab of wood beneath it for her to sign. That was one thing he taught her, how to sign her name. Too much of her duties involved this, and she couldn’t have Lorcan sign every document. She was Lady of Perranth, and any decisions put to paper would be given her seal of approval.

When she finished signing he kept the papers in place. His eyes moved in quick, tiny movements. She knew this look, he was trying to figure out what she was thinking. What had her heart beating like this. She tipped her head to the side, toying with him.

She told him, “Seal the letters, then I’ll tell.”

Lorcan did as told, always the obedient husband. Elide scooted deeper into the bed and pulled the covers over her legs. Her husband quickly followed suit and pulled her into his side. He kissed the top of her head, her brilliant little head, as he liked to call it.

“So, tell me, what thought has my wife looking so pleased with herself?”

Elide tipped her chin up to Lorcan. She wanted to share this thought looking him in the eye. “I thought of another good reason to heal my ankle, and learn to read and write. Our children.” Lorcan’s eyes lit up, she loved when she was able to do that to him. She knew he was simultaneous sniffing her, and paused to see if he knew something she didn’t. Lorcan’s head shook just barely, but the light never faded in those onyx eyes.

Elide shared the rest of her thought. “This injury is something I can change. I’d be ashamed if I refused the healing and then regret missing time running around with our children.”

Lorcan thought about it. “That is a beautiful image.” He mused, “Lady or Perranth running barefoot, playing tag with her young child.”

“Children.” Elide said. “We agreed to have as many children as possible.”

“I would be a very lucky male to have just one child with you, Elide.”

Elide’s stomach filled with butterflies at the words. No one but her got to experience Lorcan’s soft, gentle side. No one until their children come, she reminded herself. He was going to make a great father.

“When I can read, I will read them as many stories as they want. I will stay up all night reading the entire library if they wish it. Then, I will help them learn to read.”

Lorcan squeezed Elide in close. She could feel his limbs growing heavier, he needed to sleep. Yet he still voiced another image he had coming to mind.

“I can’t wait to walk into a room and find my wife and my child enthralled in a story. You will read so well that even I’ll immediately become invested in the tale. I would gladly stay up with you two all night, listening to whatever you read to us.”

Elide chuckled at the thought of Lorcan cross legged and wide eyed about childhood stories. Of course, he never had a chance to be that child. Elide barely had.

Elide stroked Lorcan’s forearm. “Our children will have every luxury and experience we were deprived.” 

Lorcan hummed his agreement. Without looking she knew his eyes were closed, and within a minute he will be snoring. She lowered herself down on the bed, guiding Lorcan with her. Sleeping together like this was still new, and Elide often marveled over it. Not just the intimacy of it, but the peace that came with the war being over. They no longer alternated keeping watch over a campsite, shivered in a tent, or lay awake thinking of the doom they marched towards. They just slept on a plush mattress and woke when the sun filled the room.

Tonight, she closed her eyes and dreamed of the future. She no longer limped, no longer thought of clever excuses to not read a message handed to her, and she and Lorcan welcomed child after child after child into this world.


	2. Chapter 2

The letters had been sent off two weeks ago. The librarian Lorcan had contacted sent a list of recommendations, and they were now in the process of interviewing the candidates to decide who was up for the task of teaching an adult to read, and trustworthy enough to keep it quiet. She had expected a longer wait for Yrene’s response.

The woman was busy organizing an Adarlan Torre, not to mention the last Elide heard she’d already taken on a large patient list while teaching healers. She was doing her best to find any surviving healers to come to her aid, but any who had survived already took up responsibility in whatever city or town they lived in. Few were able to help her in the effort to train the next generation of healers.

Lorcan explained Yrene herself didn’t need to come, not when she was seven months pregnant and had her own big projects to accomplish. They would just appreciate recommendations for healers who could help. They’d even contact the Torre in Antica if they needed to, but names of healers would be appreciated.

Elide continued to bring lunch to Lorcan, let him read her letters, and worked the salve into her skin to keep the pain at bay. The city continued to recover, which made Elide glow with pride at the work her people were doing. She started initiating for more leisure activities for the city. She hosted weekly concerts in the city gardens, pushed for artists to form communities to beautify the city, organized days of play for the children of the city, and various other activities.

Everyone worked so hard, and she heard from many citizens that they were excited for the physical rebuilding to be done so they could rebuild as a community. This was something Elide could do with her damaged ankle. Sure, she couldn’t join in the three-legged footrace with the children, but she could organize, attend, and continue to raise morale in her still fragile citizens.

Of course, this often left her and Lorcan with even less alone time. Lorcan put on a brave face and never complained, but she knew they both wanted nothing more than to be locked in their room and left undisturbed for just a few hours, though a solid week might be preferred. At best they bathed together, and enjoyed exploring each other’s bodies for an hour or so before falling asleep. Mostly they had enough time for Lorcan to rub her ankle before they fell asleep after a few moments of conversation.

Elide wondered if this was how the rest of the court was fairing. It wasn’t too different from their days toughing it as a moving army, wishing for more time, more sleep, and a better world. At the time she hadn’t thought building that world would be this tiring. Though, it was worth it. It wasn’t even complete, but Elide knew it was worth it every time she walked past the stairwell she fell down as a child. The stairwell that led to the tower she was captive in for ten years.

She never lingered by the staircase. It’d taken her two weeks to even brave showing Lorcan the tower’s location, and even then, she pulled him by the elbow before he could suggest going upstairs. She wasn’t ready to face that part of the castle. Not yet.

The closest she had come to acknowledging that part of her life had been asking for her nursemaid, Finnula. If she was in the city Elide would make sure to reunite with the woman and keep her comfortable for the rest of her life. However, no one had any news on Finnula that dated before Elide’s own confinement. It would seem that Finnula was erased from this world just like Elide had been destined to before she met Manon Blackbeak.

Yet she still asked. Whenever she met someone who worked in the castle, or had inside information on Vernon she asked about Finnula. Have you seen her? Is she alive? Or did Vernon do the worst?

If she could, she’d have Finnula join her in her reading lessons. The woman may be older, but she could still have the opportunity to learn.

Lorcan’s deep voice pulled Elide out of her thoughts, “I guess we will have to go with Lynoel.”

Elide chuckled, focusing now on lightly running her nail along Lorcan’s chest to see how many goosebumps she could cause. He didn’t seem to notice, but she knew if she did it for long enough he would eventually break and she’d wrap her body around his once again.

“I liked Lynoel better anyways.” Elide admitted. “Though we should thank Reten for declining the interview. I needed this hour with you.”

Lorcan pressed a kiss to Elide’s hair, his own fingers brushing over Elide’s bare skin. “Not as much as me,” he countered. The couple basked in the silence of their room, completely at peace with the world. The only thing that broke them from this vigil was the knock at the door.

Elide stretched as Lorcan slid out from the bed. She covered herself, which made Lorcan pause to marvel at her small body still outlined by the thin sheets, her expression content, and her hair a knotted mess spread across the pillow. Elide smiled at her husband, but beckoned he continue to put on his pants.

Elide said, “Hurry up and get the door. It’s lunch and I’m famished!”

Amused, Lorcan went to the door shirtless to collect the food. He swung the door open and stepped aside to let the food cart pass through the door. However, it wasn’t any servant they had.

“Silba above, you all know how to keep a pregnant woman waiting.”

Elide bolted into a seated position in bed, clutching the single sheet she used to cover herself. Lorcan moved to her side quickly. 

The very pregnant Yrene was in no way shocked by Lord and Lady Lochan’s lack of proper clothing, of course she has made bodies her business. Elide was sure it would take a lot to shock the healer.

“Yrene!” Elide said, pulling for more blankets to hide herself. “We weren’t expecting you— Chaol!” Elide’s face was red hot when Lord Westfall followed behind his wife. Lorcan was standing in front of Elide before she had to sit there in embarrassment for another moment longer. He opened a robe in front of her, shielding her as she dressed in it.

“Sorry to barge in like this,” Chaol said, putting his focus on helping Yrene into a chair while Elide fixed her hair and Lorcan donned a shirt. “The Lady’s Maid and I both argued that my over eager wife should wait until you came down to greet us.”

Elide felt a little more comfortable with her robe on, but she was still the least dressed of anyone in the room.

“We didn’t even know you were coming today.” Elide admitted. “We didn’t really expect you at all, Yrene. You’re due to give birth—”

“In eight weeks, yes. Plenty of time to heal your ankle and return home.” Yrene rubbed her swollen belly. She was so much bigger than she had been four months ago, it was to be expected but Elide was still blown away by the sheer size of her. It was both beautiful and daunting when she imagined herself enduring pregnancy.

“I sent word ahead of us.” Yrene said. “Of course, it wasn’t much notice because instead of sending it the day before we departed from Rifthold as I had planned, my pregnant brain packed it with my shoes. I only found it two days ago, but went ahead and sent it.”

“Did you not receive it?” Chaol asked.

“No,” Lorcan said. “But in the chaos of rebuilding messages have a tendency to get lost or delayed.”

“Well, we’re here now.” Yrene said. “Once the letter arrives you can see a detailed schedule regarding the healing. We can start whenever you are ready.”

Elide looked to Lorcan. Everything was happening at once, she was caught off guard and needed to collect herself.

“We have a few things we need to put in order first,” Lorcan said.

“Of course,” Yrene said holding her spot in the chair. “Starting with getting dressed, I’m sure.”

Elide smiled, “That’s just to start. I hate to make both of you go back downstairs, but we will meet you in the dining room. Lunch should be served shortly.”

“Great, I am a bottomless pit right now.” Yrene said. She reached her arms up and Chaol stood to meet them. The process of helping Yrene stand from the plush chair she’d settled into was awkward, Elide saw Lorcan lurch to take a step towards them to help twice before Yrene was on her feet again.

“Ask the servants for anything else you need,” Elide said. She watched Yrene waddle, Chaol’s hand placed gently on the small of her back. Before Lorcan closed the door she promised, “We’ll be down shortly.”

Elide sunk on the bed, her crippled ankle sticking out for her to examine. It was happening. The badge of abuse she’d worn for half a decade was now to be healed. Lorcan let out a sigh and sank next to her.

“You okay?” He asked, his eyes had been on her ankle, but now it found her face.

“Yeah.” She said. “Just trying to wrap my head around it all.”

“When would you like to begin?”

“I don’t know.” Elide confessed. “I don’t think Yrene can wait very long, she needs to get back to Adarlan to have the babe. Not to mention she has the Torre to build, and Chaol is still second to the king. We should start as soon as possible, tonight or tomorrow. I still feel unprepared.”

“I wish we’d gotten the damn letter.”

“Shit.” Elide lifted her good foot. Below her feet was her discarded skirt. She poked it with her heel until she heard the familiar crunch of paper. Lorcan heard it and bent over to retrieve three letters in Elide’s pocket.

“I received a note from Yrene this morning.” Elide groaned, “When you were meeting with the soldiers about the watch tower.”

Lorcan read the letter aloud to Elide. She caught most of the important details, but mostly she was reminding herself that the healing process also meant a learning process.

“We start as soon as Yrene is ready.” Elide said before Lorcan could finish the letter. “We send word to Lynoel so he is ready. This is one slip up, but I can’t be Lady of Perranth if I can’t read.”

“I doubt that,” Lorcan muttered, refolding the letter and placing it on the bedside table. He’d seen the way she handled her duties, even if Elide revealed she couldn’t read, Lorcan was certain they would make accommodations for her in the same way they helped her with her broken ankle. “But I’ll write to him and we’ll have it sent out before we sit for lunch.”

Elide and Lorcan descended the stairs together. At the sight of the first footman, Lorcan handed off the note to be sent to Lynoel. He also instructed the young man to clear their plans for the day and to give their excuses to anyone who asked. Important company was in town, they could make up the cancelled meetings tomorrow. Chaol and Yrene were seated next to each other at the small table set up for lunch.

“You didn’t have to wait for us,” Elide said, taking a seat across from Yrene. Neither Lady or Lord Westfall had any food on their plate, likely out of manners. “You’ve had a long journey, eat as much as you like.”

“Thank you,” Chaol said kindly. Yrene was already filling her plate. “The city looks beautiful, by the way.”

Lorcan sat up just a fraction of an inch taller, btu Elide noticed, as he said, “Thank you. It has been a long, but rewarding process. How is Anielle?”

“Still in shambles, I’m afraid.” Chaol looked to Yrene, “We’ve postponed building our home until everyone else is safely housed.”

“Will you build it in Anielle or Rifthold?” Elide asked.

Yrene swallowed, “Anielle. That will be our home. Dorian has made accommodations for us at Rifthold that are available whenever we need them.”

Elide kept her attention on Yrene, glowing in a way that only a woman with child could, “Did you all have a safe journey here?”

Yrene nodded, mouth full, but Chaol voiced the response. “Yes. We traveled slowly, but that was barely an inconvenience.”

Yrene smiled at Chaol, an idle hand rested on her belly. Elide was caught up in them, she nearly jumped when Lorcan put a hand on her leg and gave it a squeeze.

Elide cleared her throat. Speaking softly, but confidently she said, “You really didn’t have to come. I thought we made that clear in the letter that we just needed a recommendation since you’re already busy.”

“Nonsense.” Yrene waved them off. “This is the perfect time. The Torre is mostly paperwork right now, reaching out to healers to see who would be willing to teach and who would like to train, picking out curtains and such. If I’m not with a patient, then I’m usually tied to a desk. Not to mention I will be even busier once the baby comes, so I might as well do what I can while the baby is confined.”

“And what will you be doing, Chaol?” Lorcan asked.

“I will be strengthening Adarlan’s relationship with Terrasan and Perranth.” He bowed his head towards Lord and Lady of Perranth. “For the next three weeks I am at your service.”

Lorcan considered this. “Are you up for physical work? We have plenty of meetings for you to attend, and people to meet if you’d rather strengthen ties that way. However, starting tomorrow there will be a city council meeting to decide what rebuilding projects I am to be assigned to, you are welcome to join me in tilling fields, repairing homes, and any other labor the council deems most important.”

“I can’t think of a better way to strengthen ties.” Chaol smiled. “I will do what I can with my back.”

“Don’t push it,” Yrene warned. “Otherwise you’ll be more hurt and therefore indisposed.”

“There’s plenty of jobs and chores you could do if your back won’t allow it.” Elide added. “I run food and water to the laborers, entertain bored children, things like that. They might not be hammer and nails, but they’re jobs.”

“They’re very vital.” Lorcan affirmed, giving Elide a pointed look. “This is why Elide wants to do the healing now. She feels that she could do more for the efforts.”

“I _could_ do more.”

Elide felt Yrene’s eyes on her without having to look up from her plate. The healer spoke, “We will talk about it more when we’re alone.”

Elide understood. Yrene had mentioned the other part of healing physical wounds was emotional or mental wounds. She warned that feeling vulnerable about these wounds was normal, and submitting to the vulnerability helped her overcome them. Elide had heard Yrene and the other healers talking with the soldiers during the war, helping them work through their battlefield traumas, thus speeding up the healing process. Yrene often commented that Chaol would’ve healed twice as fast if he hadn’t been so stubborn about his soul wounds.

“What we should discuss now is that there is an entire city council meeting to decide where Lorcan is going to be the most useful. How did that get started?”

Elide smiled at her husband, “He is known as the male willing to do any job. Every morning there would be a crowd waiting to ask him to help, he could barely finish one project without agreeing to another until his list became endless.”

“This is more efficient. I am assigned to the most important project and can rotate jobs so everyone is moving forward.”

Chaol raised his glass. “I’d heard Terrasan was giving more power to the people than the royals.”

“Keeps them happy,” Elide said. “I don’t know when I’d have time to do anything if some responsibilities weren’t delegated to citizens.”

The door to the dining room swung open. “Merrik,” Elide greeted to the footman.

“My Lady,” Merrik bowed to Elide. “My Lord,” he bowed to Lorcan. Then he bowed to their guest, “Lord and Lady Westfall. Pardon me, ma’am, but it’s an urgent note from Queen Aelin.”

He held out the tray to Elide, who took the folded parchment with Aelin’s seal. She’d done this so many times, but it still made her nervous when mail was brought to her.

“Thank you Merrik,” Lorcan said, he was carefully eyeing Elide. She usually made an excuse to not read a letter immediately, either declaring the person in the room with her was more important or handing it to Lorcan as if he was no more than her assistant.

Merrik exited the room, and Elide remained silent. Her delicate hands shook, the parchment began to crumple as she tried to control it.

“Are you okay?” Yrene asked.

“Is something wrong in Orynth?” Chaol wondered aloud.

There was no excuse to not rip open an urgent letter from the queen. Elide pushed her plate aside and rest her hands, still holding the letter, on the table.

“There’s no use hiding from you two.” She confessed, her eyes never raising to meet even Lorcan’s gaze. “You’ll find out soon enough.”

There was a click, and the door opened again. Merrik re-entered the room, Elide raised her chin towards him, but she still looked pale.

“Pardon me, Lords and Ladies, but a Mister Lynoel Woren has arrived. He is at your disposal.”

Elide nodded. “Go ahead and send him in,” she commanded. “You will need to meet him sooner or later, I’m sure you’ll be seeing a lot of each other while you’re here.”

Yrene and Chaol looked more and more worried as the scholar stepped into the room. He was thin, like many citizens he had been malnourished during Vernon’s time as Lord. Yet, he had told Elide and Lorcan he found feeding his mind helped get him through the years. He wasn’t much older than Elide, and despite his superior knowledge on literature he had dedicated himself to teaching the children of the city how to read. The librarian who recommended him said he was destined to be a professor, but he knew if he didn’t teach the youth there would be no college for him to work for.

He bowed to his Lord and Lady, the spectacles he kept on perched in his brown hair tipped dangerously forward until he realized they were there.

“I’m sorry to intrude on lunch,” he began. “But the note said to come at my earliest convenience.”

“Have you had lunch?” Elide asked, gesturing to the stack of plates on the table.

Startled, Lynoel blushed. “Yes, I have, Lady. Thank you, for the offer.”

“Please, sit,” she beckoned. “This is Lord Chaol Westfall, and Lady Yrene Westfall.”

He gave the Adarlans a jittery half bow. “A pleasure,” Lynoel said, sitting himself and his satchel at the head of the table. Yrene and Chaol were still waiting to hear how an urgent letter from the queen related to a young man carrying a satchel of books that likely weighed more than him.

Elide hadn’t realized that the silence had gone on for too long, until Lorcan took the letter from her hands. She released it, and let him read it. Everyone held their breath. Even Lynoel who had recognized the seal.

“It can wait.” Lorcan announced. “Go on, Elide. You have an audience.”

“Lynoel is here to tutor me.” Elide explained, “He is a local scholar who continued to publish literary reviews and critiques to be circulated when the city felt they would never know joy and kindness every again. He also works with the children to teach them to read, both at a basic level and a critical level.”

“That’s lovely,” Yrene said. As an educator herself they understood each other. Lynoel’s cheeks were flushed, but he accepted the compliments graciously.

“Since I am going to be bed ridden for three weeks, I thought now would be the best time to—” Elide’s throat contracted. She was Lady of Perranth, she had been locked in a tower with a kind, but illiterate nursemaid. She had survived the jailing, survived her uncle, survived a war, she could admit this to a stranger and two friends. She started over, “I hesitated over the letter, and allowed Lorcan to read it because I can’t.”

She couldn’t stop the tear from falling down her cheek, but she refused to let her back curve in the slightest. She looked to the scholar first. Lorcan hadn’t explained in the last letter exactly what he was doing. He had been given vague details about who his student would be, or even if he was teaching them advanced literature or just literacy. He seemed eager to do either.

“If you would be so kind to be discrete about this, Lynoel, I would appreciate it if you taught me to read and write.”

To his credit, the admission made him less of a jittery commoner, and more of the professor the librarian described him as. Maybe it was just Lorcan glaring at him from behind Elide, but Elide had spent years learning to read people. His eyes were clear and focused, his back straight. He wasn’t afraid or defensive, he was truly the best candidate for this job. Caring more for his students than any leverage he might have, or saving his bones from being cracked by a powerful fae.

He nodded. “I would be honored to do such. I have helped a few adults learn before, it’s not as uncommon as you think.”

Elide forced the corners of her mouth to turn upwards. They had chosen wisely. She looked at Chaol and Yrene, now they understood the secret her own queen didn’t know.

“This is a good start to the healing process.” Yrene reached a hand out to Elide. “Admission is sometimes the hardest part.”

“I received your letter this morning,” Elide confessed. “I forgot earlier, but I’d put it in my pocket after accepting it because Lorcan wasn’t with me. We usually go over my correspondences during lunch and before bed.”

“Ah,” Yrene understood. “And today before you could get the letter from out of your pocket Lorcan had your skirt—” Chaol cleared his throat. To his own credit, Lorcan had learned it was not polite to give people his signature death glare. Especially if they were seated next to their spouse, and even more especially if they were a pregnant friend. Elide was impressed, he was still working on accepting that even if he could easily take Chaol out, it wasn’t something friends did. Instead he refrained and cleared his throat to try and release the tension.

Lynoel had returned to blushing and being bashful. Elide’s hands had steadied, she felt more confident now. “We’ve arranged for you to have a room in the North wing. Anything you need, let the servants know. All three of you are our honored guests, and I am grateful for your healing and teaching. Merrik can show you to your rooms, and I’ll send word when I am ready to begin.”

Elide and Lorcan rose with the rest of the party. Lorcan held the door for them, also muttering his thanks to them. Once they’d rounded the corner Elide took her husband’s hand and guided him to the library.


	3. Chapter 3

“What did the letter say?” She asked once behind closed doors. Lorcan ignored the question and put his arms around her. She let her walls come crashing down and hugged him back. Contact like this always had a way of making her open up.

Lorcan stroked her dark hair, giving her the space to release any emotions she’d held in in the dining room. He bent over and whispered into her hair, “You handled that very well, Lady Lochan.”

Elide squeezed him tighter. She didn’t cry, just breathed in and out, letting her nerves fizzle out, and his strong arms remind her that she was strong, a force to be reckoned with. After a few minutes, she loosened her arms, and pulled back.

“It has been a long time coming.” Elide said. “I can only force people to read and write for me in meetings for so long. And it’s already hard enough to keep Aelin’s book club demands at bay.”

Lorcan chuckled, “She is persistent about everyone reading her favorite books.” He gave Elide a final look over to make sure she was alright, then pulled out the letter from the queen. “Queen Aelin requires your attendance to a court assembly. Arrive at Orynth as soon as you can so they assembly may commence. If you have reason to delay, send word immediately.”

Elide mulled over the demand. “Then we will send word. I can’t put off the healing, because that will either mean sending Yrene back home as soon as she got here, or making her wait until the assembly is over and by then she’ll likely be in labor.”

Lorcan was already drafting a response. Watching him Elide couldn’t help but voice her thoughts. “I am tired of needing you to manage my correspondence. I’ve spent enough time being helpless that I am sick of it.”

Lorcan paused his writing to look at Elide. His eyes were intent with honesty, she had no choice but to stand there and give her full attention. “I never grow tired of helping you. Any way I can service you is my greatest honor, Elide. But I am also infinitely proud of the way you are improving the life of your citizens and your own.”

Elide couldn’t help but feel lifted by his speech. With their pre-lunch activities still fresh on her mind Elide looked at him coyly. “ _Any_ way you can service me?”

Lorcan matched her gaze, his nostrils flaring to smell her. But just as quickly as she got him riled up, she reined it in. She put her back to him, pretending to look at a book and said, “I need to go talk to Yrene.”

Lorcan gave a low growl that made Elide’s toes curl involuntarily. She heard his pen continue to scratch along the paper. Likely still noting her scent Lorcan said, “Ask her if we can continue to be intimate while you’re healing.”

Elide turned on her heels, delighting in their little game. “What happens if the answer is no?”

Lorcan put the pen down and rose. He was taller than anyone Elide knew, and he towered over her. He could easily dominate her, but she’d have to let him first. He began to walk slowly towards her, drawing out each word as he closed the space between them.

“Then,” Lorcan said, “I will clear both of our schedules and make your legs shake so hard you’ll be thankful for three weeks of bed rest.”

Elide swallowed hard, not realizing how dry her throat was until that moment. Lorcan stood mere inches from her, yet she resisted her body’s urge to touch him. Lorcan’s word was his currency, and she had learned well enough that he always came through on these kinds of promises.

Lorcan twirled a strand of Elide’s hair between his fingers. “And that is just before you begin. What happens after... that will be a whole other beast.”

“Tell me what happens after. When my ankle is healed, and I can read.”

“For three weeks I won’t be able to touch you the way I want. Three weeks I will only crave you and think of all the ways I want to fuck you.” Elide moaned. Lorcan lowered his head down, close to her ear, but working his way to her neck. “I’ll spend every spare moment lost in thought about the way you moan beneath me, the way you taste on my tongue, and the way you feel when I’m inside you. It will be torture, but I’ll get through. I’ll be saving all of this energy for you. For when you are freed from your confines. For you to just say the word and I’ll unleash myself on you.”

His breath was hot on her skin, but he still refused to touch her. She was arching, no longer resisting her body’s desire.

“I don’t want to be bedridden any longer than I have to.” Elide toyed, trying her best to get back at him.

Lorcan lifted his eyes to her, “Oh, you won’t just be bedridden. There are plenty of other surfaces in our suite. In this castle.”

Elide moaned again. She could see it playing out before it happened. Lorcan would bring a kiss, hard and unforgiving to her mouth. His hands would work furiously to hike her skirt up to her waist and lift her onto the table behind her. Her hands would find his pant buckle, the motion of releasing his buttons well practiced.

“I need you, Lord Lorcan Lochan.” Elide said, and waited for the scene to play out. “Now.”

Lorcan stepped back, the picture of restraint. “Get your answer from the healer first.”

Elide gaped at him, frustrated from the rejection. Yet the thrill still clung to her. This game was something started when it was hard to find privacy while living with an army and an over bearing queen. The results of such games were always worth it. Elide never knew she would forget her own name so frequently in her life.

Lorcan only looked at her from the corner of his eye as she walked away.

Wren, the maid Elide was able to catch walking in the halls, had said the couple hadn’t left their room. Elide had arranged for Yrene and Chaol to be housed on the same floor as her and Lorcan. This way Yrene didn’t have to travel up and down stairs to visit her patient. Elide knocked at their door and waited.

After a minute Yrene opened the door. “Elide,” she greeted, “Come in.”

Elide thanked her and stepped into the suite. Chaol was lounging on the chaise, he’d removed the formal layers of his clothes, and judging the thin sheen of sweat on his brow she imagined he had just finished a training routine.

“I didn’t mean to intrude.” Elide said.

“This isn’t intruding,” Chaol countered. “Please, sit.”

Elide obliged and sat across from Chaol. Yrene remained standing between them. “There is nothing I love and hate more as a pregnant woman than sitting. My feet don’t hurt too bad right now, so I’ll remain standing.”

“I’ll make this quick,” Elide said. “I wanted to say I’d like to start the process as soon as possible. I don’t want to delay your return to Adarlan any longer than necessary.”

Yrene spoke softly, “We can wait a day or two. This is an injury you have had for many years, and one that comes with a great amount of trauma. Without the warning of my arrival I’d understand if you needed more time to let it settle.”

Elide shook her head. “No. It’s time I put the past behind me. This part of my life is over, the world is changing, healing, and so should I.”

Yrene couldn’t hide her glee. She lifted her arms and began pulling her golden-brown hair back into a bun. “I am ready to begin right now. Shall we?”

Elide swallowed. Then stood up, “I should tell Lorcan. He wants to be as involved as possible.”

Yrene looked to Chaol. “Could you go fetch Lord Lorcan Lochan?”

Chaol rose from his chair, grabbing a jacket from a trunk. “I would love to go find Lord Lorcan Lochan.”

“I left him in the downstairs library. You passed it on your way to the stairs from the dining room.” Elide said, “If he’s not there just say Lord Lorcan Lochan three times fast and spin in place four times. He should appear after that.”

Chaol’s laugh sounded surprised, like even he didn’t expect it to come out. Elide’s humor had that effect on most people. For some reason nobody expected her to be funny. They also didn’t expect Lorcan to be funny, but when he joked it was mostly met by shocked looks.

Now just the two of them, Yrene turned to Elide. “Listen, what you admitted today was very brave of you. I want to be clear with you that you can trust me, and you can trust Chaol, though you don’t have to confess everything you say to me to him.”

“Thank you,” Elide said. “Lorcan and Manon are the only other people who know.”

Elide opened the door and led Yrene down to her room. A maid had come in, made the bed, and collected any dirty and discarded clothes from the floor.

“Your life has changed a lot in the past year.” Yrene noted.

“So has yours.” Elide gave a pointed look to Yrene’s protruding belly.

“I can’t deny that,” Yrene patted her belly. “Would you like to feel the baby kick?”

Elide had never thought of it, but she nodded eagerly at Yrene. The healer beckoned her over, and took her hand. She guided it to the side of her belly, and then—there it was. Something hit the spot Yrene had placed Elide’s hand, pushing at the wall of her belly just barely.

“Gods above,” Elide swore.

“I know,” Yrene said. “I’ve helped women get pregnant, endure the pregnancy, give birth, and everything after and in between. Yet, I have found nothing as magical and miraculous as my own baby growing inside me, kicking me so I never forget they’re alive.”

Elide’s hand still rested on her belly. She had a feeling spending this much time with Yrene was going to make her want a baby of her own more than she already did. Maybe in three weeks when Lorcan made good on his promises she could convince him to stop taking his daily tonic. Which reminded her.

Elide dropped her hand. “I have a question about the healing.”

Yrene gave a knowing smile. “I wouldn’t recommend it, if you’re about to ask what I think you’re about to ask.”

“Why not?”

“The act won’t necessarily arm your ankle, but for a portion of the recovery process your ankle will be elevated. Unless you two are crafty that I know, sex is difficult. Not to mention at any other point in the process I don’t want you risking hitting or crushing your ankle, pushing the healing back several steps. So, you can if you’re careful and go easy, there’s no harm in pleasure, but I’d say it’s safest to abstain.”

Elide’s cheeks warmed, but she agreed. Anything to not hinder her healing.

“Where do we start?” Elide asked, just as the door opened. Lorcan entered, but Chaol announced he was going for a run. For a moment Elide wished she’d thought to go for a walk before agreeing to sit in bed for three weeks.

“Tonight is just going to be a consultation. An opportunity for me to examine your ankle, see if any further damage has been done, gage your pain tolerance so I can set the pace, and so forth. Basically, I’m just going to poke around with my magic and call it a night. The real healing will begin tomorrow.”

Elide looked towards Lorcan, who took her hand from where he stood next to her. Yrene propped a stool up before Elide and beckoned for her ankle. While she searched Elide’s ankle she mumbled about various things Elide didn’t understand. Scar tissue, false ligaments, bone fractures, arthritis, and stress on the tendons.

“When your ankle is healed, I am also going to leave you with a packet of exercises to do for your hip and knee. You’ve likely lost a lot of muscle and mobility from leaning too much on your good ankle. If I can find a healer in the city, I will train them enough to guide you through the exercises once I’m gone, so you’ll be evened out, if you know what I mean.”

“So, the recovery will go beyond three weeks.” Lorcan said, “That’s a long time for a Lady.”

“This injury has gone on for a long time. If a healer had seen to her immediately it would’ve just been about the broken bones. Now it’s about the bones, and the over worked hip and knee, and the stressed tendons in her ankle and foot.”

Yrene adjusted her grip on Elide’s ankle. “I’m going to start gaging your pain, but I want you to be ready.”

“What are you going to do?” Lorcan asked. Elide could feel sweat form under her arms and on her back. She focused on her ankle, telling herself she had survived worse. She could survive the pain again.

“I’m going to pull a little on the false ligaments, do a few test scrapes on the scar tissue, and roll her ankle. Keep in mind that I will only do these actions for a few seconds today, it’s only a test to tell if you can withstand the pain for longer periods.”

Elide didn’t realize she was biting her lip so hard until she opened her mouth to respond, “I understand. If I can’t do it—take the pain—then what happens?”

“Then,” Yrene considered her ankle, “I will give you tonics to help with the pain. They’re good, very effective, but they can also be addictive. I don’t give it to patients unless I absolutely have to.”

“Can’t your magic put her to sleep? Would that be an option for when you work?”

“I could, yes. But since this wound is so deeply attached to a soul wound, it’s best to have the patient awake and aware when healing.”

Yrene tilted her head to the side. She’d been exploring Elide’s ankle more while discussing the options.

“This break is fresh,” Yrene announced. “From a few months ago.”

Elide didn’t deny the break. “It happened in Anielle.” She gripped Lorcan’s hand tighter, leaned into his side, anything to help remind her that he was real and alive. “When I found Lorcan he was weak, so I had to support us both and push him onto Forscha. It broke then.”

Lorcan sank to the bed next to Elide. She’d never told him, just endured the pain. There had been bigger things happening anyways. Forgetting Yrene, Lorcan brushed Elide’s hair back, his eyes trying to read her mind. Elide held his stare, she would not apologize for what she did. She would never regret it.

Yrene gave them a moment, then continued. “There isn’t as much scar tissue around it, and the break is clean.”

"What does that mean?” Elide asked, she could tell the healer was getting to something.

“It won’t be easy, but I could heal this break today. We’ll still do the test, then if you can or if you would like to, I will mend this break.”

Yrene, being the wise healer she was, saw the way Elide contemplated it. And the way Lorcan was still looking at Elide.

“I’ll need to get a few things in the room first. As soon as it’s mended you’re leg needs to be elevated. I’ll go get a few things ready, and you think about it.”

Elide knew she was giving them space, and was thankful for it. Usually she hated being coddled, she’d spent most of her life being treated like a child, but right now she needed it. She’d been a child when her ankle had broken, and now all those old emotions were surfacing again.

“I heard the snap,” Lorcan said. “When your ankle broke, but I was in so much pain myself it didn’t register. We were on a battlefield, it could’ve been a number of things snapping beneath our feet. I—”

“Don’t.” Elide warned. “Don’t start apologizing for it. Your organs were threatening to fall out of your abdomen, the dam was about to bust, my ankle breaking again was the least of our problems.”

Lorcan still stared at her. She waited for him to say something, to explain why his expression had gone hard, like he might start arguing.

“That day,” his voice was low, “I thought you were a force to be reckoned with, an untamed storm. Now, I can’t even find the words to describe what you did.”

Elide touched Lorcan’s face, brushing her hands against the stubble on his cheek. “You could start with thank you.”

Lorcan finally smiled again. “Thank you, Elide, for keeping true to your promise. I hope I can be just as heroic as you one day.”

“I hope you never have a reason to do something equal to what happened in Anielle.”

Lorcan responded by kissing his wife. His hand gripped the back of her neck, while Elide’s tugged on his shoulder. His touch sent her into a frenzy. Lorcan’s long legs knocked Yrene’s chair over as he twisted, forcing Elide on her back and him on top of her. His lips started traveling south, down Elide’s neck, her chest.

Panting, Elide told Lorcan, “Yrene wants us to abstain. Once the healing begins.”

Lorcan growled so hard Elide felt it in her bones. She arched at the sensation. The healer’s command didn’t stop Lorcan for a second beyond that. He was already working the strings of her dress, desperate to get Elide’s chest bare.

The door clicked, but Lorcan sent a gust of dark wind to hold it closed. Elide heard Yrene shout something about being back in an hour.

“Time for you to make good on your promises.” Elide said, “Because the healing starts after this.”

“Very well, my Lady.” Lorcan said, peeling off her skirt.

Despite knowing Lorcan would do exactly as he promised, Elide was still surprised when she leaned against the bed post for support. Lorcan was smiling like a fool while he dressed himself, then came over to help Elide.

She was doing her best to put on a pair of silk pajama pants, but she was so spent she wanted to just collapse on the bed. Lorcan helped her button up her top, he worked slowly, taking his time doing the reverse of what he’d just done to Elide.

She let out a heavy sigh at the memory. “Oh Lorcan,” she said now just as she had a few minutes ago, naked and in a state of utter bliss.

Lorcan kissed her temple. “Yes, Elide?”

“Three weeks is going to be a very long time.”

He leaned in to whisper into her ear. “And in three weeks’ time, I will have you again.”

Elide considered taking him to bed one more time, just to savor the moment, but a knock came to the door.

“Are you two finished?” Yrene asked through the door.

Lorcan rolled his eyes and stepped away from Elide. She resumed her seat at the edge of the bed, in front of the now corrected stool for Yrene.

The healer entered, followed by two footmen, Merrik and Eliea, who carried her equipment. Yrene watched as the men and Lorcan arranged two poles at the bottom corners of their bed. Another pole was placed atop the two, and from it a piece of cloth hung for Elide’s ankle. A trunk was placed in the corner, along with Yrene’s satchel.

“Perfect,” Yrene said examining the construction. “Elide, did you know that Merrik’s sister would love to learn about healing. She claims her skills aren’t much, but Merrik has been telling me about all the healing she has done since the towers were destroyed.”

“That’s wonderful,” Elide said. “I knew we had a handful of healers still here in Perranth. What is her name?”

“Qwenta, Lady,” Merrik said. “I visit her during my hour break, and couldn’t help but tell her the news of Lady Westfall’s arrival.”

Yrene was beaming at Merrik. “If it’s alright with you, I’d love to have her join us for a few sessions so she can learn about untreated injuries. But, that will come later so you don’t have to give me an answer. Shall we begin?”

Lorcan turned to the two footman who stood dutifully by the door. “You’re excused. Thank you for helping Lady Yrene.”

The men bowed and left the room. Elide lifted her ankle to Yrene, whose face was still flush with joy. She pulled a tin of salve from her pocket and began rubbing Elide’s ankle.

“I hope you two enjoyed your hour together.” Yrene teased, “Keep it up and I’ll be back here in a few months to help with a delivery.”

Elide and Lorcan looked at each other, unable to contain the hope they had for such things. Turning back to Yrene Elide blushed. She wasn’t used to someone being so openly aware with her and Lorcan’s activities.

“We don’t usually have so much free time.” Elide confessed.

“We’re just trying to be prepared for the next three weeks,” Lorcan added. Elide giggled, and was surprised to hear Yrene laugh as well.

“As your healer, I have to say I’m happy to hear you two are already taking this seriously.”

The word crushed any playfulness between the three of them. Elide sat as straight as she could. “I’m ready.”


	4. Chapter 4

“Very good,” Yrene took a tight hold of Elide’s ankle. Her magic went deeper than it had before. Where it had just been nothing more than a brush, it now dug into her. Elide had set herself to be stronger, so she wouldn’t need the tonic. She was going to feel every bit of this, confrontation head on was the only way she knew how to handle her problems.

But the scream rose to her throat before she had time to fight it. The digging felt like it went on for an hour, but Yrene had promised just a few seconds. Elide was breathing heavy, when Yrene stopped the test.

Lorcan was speaking. “Are you okay?”

Elide nodded. “I’m fine.” She set her expression in steel, just as she’d done a million times to hide the pain in her ankle. “I was just caught off guard.”

Yrene reached up and placed a hand on Elide’s head. Something in Elide calmed, she steadied her breathing, focused on her slowing heartbeat.

“If you can’t handle it I will give you the tonic.”

“No.” Elide said definitely. “I can do this.”

Yrene put Elide’s ankle down and scooted closer. “If you’re going to be stubborn then you at least need to remember to breath during this. Do it with me.” Yrene sucked in two quick breathes of air, then released one long breath. Elide followed—in, in, out— repeating it over and over until Yrene tapped her leg. “Good.”

She scooted her stool back and took up the ankle. “Do you want to try me testing the scar tissue again, or should I go for the ligaments?”

“What are those?” Elide asked, more as an excuse to have another moment without the pain than anything.

“The scar tissue is a buildup of tissue surrounding an injury. The most visible kind is a scar on your skin. The thick build up from where the injury was. It can build internally too, and I’ll have to scrape it away to get to the base of the injury. Ligaments are formed to keep your bones connected, they’re like thick pieces of elastic. False ligaments are rare, but they’ve formed on your ankle to try and keep your snapped bones together. I will have to remove them because they’re no longer necessary.”

Elide hardly registered such thoughts. She was still reeling a bit from the first test.

“Go for the scar tissue again. I can handle this.” As Yrene once again lead her through the breathing method she wondered if she was speaking to herself, to the healer, or to the male who was tensing up more than she was for this test.

Yrene dug her magic in, and this time Elide was ready. She focused on breathing, on keep the scream in her chest subdued, and most of all, she was fighting the memories of falling down those tower stairs. Yrene paused just long enough to say, “Good” before her magic began tugging at something in Elide’s ankle.

She grunted, and gripped Lorcan’s hand harder, but held strong. Yrene’s focus could’ve been deadly, but it made Elide feel safe, protected for some reason. If Yrene was strong in this moment, Elide could be too.

The magic receded, taking most of the pain with it. Elide inhaled deeply, trying to regain control of her breath. It hitched once when Yrene tested the mobility.

“I can handle this.” Elide repeated. “I can handle this.”

“It’s okay if you can’t.” Lorcan said, he looked like he had just suffered as much pain as she had.

Elide slipped into Lady of Perranth easily as she declared, “But I can.”

There was little arguing with Lady of Perranth, and Lorcan knew it. He bowed out of the argument, but she knew he meant well offering an alternative.

“Would you like me to heal the most recent break? If you need to rest, let me know.”

“No, go ahead and heal it.”

“Tell me to stop if it’s too much.” Yrene told her. “If the pain is too much, tell me to stop. Okay?”

“Okay.” Elide adjusted herself on the bed, trying to get a better grip on her bearings. “Do it.”

Yrene looked at Lorcan, who nodded. Ready or not, Lorcan was going to be at Elide’s side for this.

Yrene’s shoulder’s rose, and Elide prepared herself for the pain. She kept her eyes open to focus on Yrene. The woman was taking good care of her. She could trust this. This wasn’t harmful pain, this was healing pain. She had endured worse.

“You’re doing great,” Lorcan said in her ear. “I’m so proud of you. You’re the strongest woman I’ve ever met, the strongest person to ever cross my path.”

Elide closed her eyes and leaned into his words. Breathing was growing difficult, but when he noticed a break in her pattern, Lorcan would pause long enough to guide her again. In, in, out. Over and over again. “I’m so proud of you. You are a force to be reckoned with. Nothing can hold you back.” In, in, out. In, in, out. “I love you, Elide.”

The words broke something in her. She screamed, but this time it was his name. Instantly she was back on the battlefield, Forscha beneath her, safety of the wall behind her. She was racing into danger, and certain death. But life wasn’t worth it without Lorcan. She wouldn’t be able to live if she didn’t tell Lorcan how much she cared.

A voice that didn’t belong on this field rang through the sky, “The tissue is gone. I’m going to set the bone and bind it.”

A new pain began. Healing. This was healing. Elide reminded herself. “Stronger than any guard, soldier, or warrior. I love you, Elide. Keep going. I love you. Elide, Elide, Elide.” In, in, out. In, in, out. In, in, out. In, in, out. In, in, out.

If Elide turned her head in this nightmare, Lorcan was beside her. Leaning on her. All six and half feet of him. All of his weight on her ankle. Bone scraping bone. But not in the same way it had all those months ago. This scraping was good. Mending. That’s what it was.

She screamed his name again.

They were on the horse. A miracle. The only thing more miraculous was how fast the horse moved.

“I love you.” Was this reality or nightmare.

“It’s set. We’re in the final step. Keep breathing!”

In, in, out. In, in, out. The gate was getting farther away. Lorcan was slipping sideways. She screamed, her fingernails dug into skin. They’ve dig right down to the bone if they needed to. In, in, out. In, in, out. In, in, out. In, in, out.

In.

In.

In.

In.

In.

In.

“OUT!”

In.

 _You are strong._ Elide tried to tell her lungs to contract. In. _Strong. Stronger. I can._

A breath escaped her. Rooting her back into this world. Her ankle throbbed, but the pain was fading. She opened her eyes. Yrene was wrapping her ankle in white cloth, her magic simultaneously seeping into Elide’s chest. Steadying her heart.

Elide turned to Lorcan and let out a sob.

“I thought I’d never find you.” She confessed. “I thought we would both be washed away by that dam, and you’d die without knowing how—how—how sorry I was. I chose you. Chose this, but I still tried to shatter it. I showed the world how ugly and hateful I could be towards you, when I didn’t mean it.”

Lorcan didn’t hesitate to wrap Elide in his arms. Yrene kept the ankle stable, and didn’t complain as Lorcan hushed Elide.

“Then you—you bastard—you tried to sacrifice yourself for me. You said your piece, then threatened to slip off Forscha just to give me a damn chance at living.”

Lorcan ran a hand through her hair and down her spine. A motion he did frequently to help her fall asleep after a nightmare.

“I couldn’t let you. Not before I had a chance to make it right.” Elide hiccupped, her breath still ragged, but she was slowly calming down. “I didn’t, even then, I didn’t think we would ever get this. I hoped, but I really didn’t think we would ever see Perranth rebuild, wouldn’t get an opportunity to be joined in matrimony, have more than a few moments together once we crossed the gate. I’m so happy we did. Every day. I’m so happy we are both alive, and together.”

“Me too.” Lorcan pressed a kiss to her hair. He and Yrene must have made a silent agreement, because before she could protest Lorcan moved Elide to the headboard. He never let go of her as they moved. Yrene scooted the suspension closer to Elide, and gently placed her ankle in the sling.

“I’d do it over again. I’d race on that battlefield again and again if it meant we got to have what we have now.”

“I know.” Lorcan’s voice was soft, it lulled Elide’s eyes closed once again. “We’ll always find each other.”

“Always.” Elide repeated. Her ankle still hurt, but she was a master at ignoring the pain. She burrowed deeper into Lorcan’s hold on her.

Elide was too drowsy to open her eyes when Yrene spoke to softly, more to Lorcan than Elide. “Rest now. I’ll have dinner sent up for you two. If she needs to relieve herself, I’ve placed a pan under the bed. I’ll come check in occasionally. You did great, Elide.”

Elide hummed at the comment, but was already drifting off to sleep by the time the door closed behind Yrene.

Elide dreamed they were on Forscha again. But the day was clear. There was no rush. They rode quickly but Elide knew they’d make it. Knew they’d be safe in the end. It was the most peaceful version of this dream she’d ever had.

When Elide woke again the afternoon sun had disappeared. Lorcan was no longer at her side, but he hadn’t gone too far. Elide turned and found him at the desk, shuffling papers into neat little stacks.

When he didn’t notice her, the Lady looked up at her foot hanging above her. The pain was mostly gone, but the sight of her ankle reminded her of her bedrest order. She suddenly felt restless, she really should’ve gone for that walk. Lazily she started swinging her foot, seeing how much movement she could still manage.

Lorcan was on his feet and walking towards her a second after hearing the sling sway. Despite how raw she still felt after the healing, she was happy to see him.

“I wouldn’t do that.” Lorcan said, pointing to her ankle. “I don’t think Yrene would be too pleased if you knocked this contraption off balance and banged your newly healed ankle on the bed.”

“Partially healed,” Elide corrected. She felt a sense of pride for surviving her first healing session with Yrene. As if a god answering a prayer, Yrene opened the bedroom door and entered.

“She’s awake!” Yrene announced. “How was your nap?”

“Good.” Elide stretched, her backside felt sore from laying on it. “Can I stand up, or at least turn over?”

Yrene waited to answer until she was done taking Elide’s vitals and examining the ankle. “You can take the ankle from the sling every now and then, but the goal is to keep the swelling down to a minimum. Absolutley no weight bearing, though. Lorcan can carry you to the bathroom, and anywhere else that I deem essential. Otherwise, stay in bed and keep the ankle up in the sling. Any pain?”

“Some. But nothing serious.”

“Would you like some dinner?”

Elide’s stomach suddenly felt empty at the offer. “Yes. What time is it?”

Lorcan placed a tray in front of her. It wasn’t anything spectacular, just a sandwich and some fruit. He looked a little guilty when he admitted, “The original dinner came up hours ago, so when it got cold I had them bring you something that could sit out until you woke up again.”

Yrene gently removed her ankle from the sling and placed it on the bed. “It’s almost nine.” Yrene said, cradling Elide’s ankle while Lorcan helped her sit up in bed. “That really knocked you out.”

Elide didn’t bother responding. She’d barely eaten anything at lunch, and she was ravished after her seven hour long nap.

The healer spoke as she wrote in a journal, “I won’t ever push you that far again. We’ll still be on schedule, though.” She peered at the note on the bedside table, marking up the changes to be made. “When do you plan on having your lessons?”

Elide considered it as she chewed a large bite of her sandwich. “Evenings. I’ll arrange for Lynoel to come in the mornings so I’m not too exhausted for lessons. I guess it’s too late to call him in to discuss it.”

“The last I heard, he only left the library to eat.” Yrene said, “I’m sure he’s still there.” 

“I’ll go talk with him.” Lorcan said, “Will he be starting tomorrow?”

A few pieces of bread flew from her mouth as Elide answered.

“Very Ladylike,” Lorcan teased. She considered sticking her tongue out, but she did have company present.


	5. Chapter 5

To her great dismay, Lorcan woke Elide up with soft kisses to her cheek. She groaned, wishing her sleep hadn’t been disturbed, but also didn’t turn away from the affection.

Elide crinkled her nose, “You smell.”

Her husband laughed. “I just finished training. Do you want to bathe before your lessons?”

Elide responded with another groan. She knew she should. Bathing would wake her up, she’d be fresh for her lesson with Lynoel, and she would be able to admire Lorcan since she missed her usual morning peek out the balcony to witness his training routine. Yet, she was still so tired.

Elide had struggled to sleep that night. While Lorcan snored, Elide stared at her ankle and thought about how badly she just wanted to lay on her side. For what seemed like hours she wrestled with her sleeplessness, and even cursed Lorcan when he dared to look so peaceful in his own slumber. Finally, when she couldn’t take it any longer, she managed to wiggle her foot from the sling, catching her calf before it could fall to the bed.

Under the bed Elide kept a pillow specifically for her ankle. She managed to pull it out and stick it between her two feet while she lay on her side. Yrene might not approve, but Elide needed just a few hours of sleep before her first lesson with Lynoel.

However, this morning when she went to turn on her side she found her foot suspended in the air. Her eyes flew open to make sure it was correct.

Lorcan saw her confusion. “I put it back up before I left. Judging by the pillow I assumed you removed it last night, but I figured we should keep it elevated when we can. Come on, let’s take a bath.”

Now awake, Elide didn’t fight Lorcan as he removed her foot from the sling, and carried her to the bathroom. A knot was building in her stomach. Today was the day. She was going to start her reading and writing lessons.

Lorcan let Elide get in the tub first. Their bath tub wasn’t as extravagant, it was big enough for both of them if they wanted an intimate experience, but there was little wiggle room with Lorcan’s massive body in there. Once her people were all settled and comfortable and Elide felt good about moving on to Castle improvements, she was going to put in a large pool for her and Lorcan.

Elide sunk into the water, letting the scented salts wake her. She could’ve soaked for an hour, but Lorcan needed to wash and be on his way to work. He moved at a brisk pace, but not with urgency, just energy. He even whistled a few times while helping Telly, the maid, make the bed.

“You seem chipper this morning.” Elide commented as she lathered up a wash cloth with soap.

Lorcan froze in place, toothbrush in hand, and broke into a smile. It was a fool’s smile, despite the deathly stillness his body still maintained. Then, he laughed. Elide’s heart fluttered at his laugh, a deep belly laugh.

“I don’t think anyone has called me ‘chipper’ in all my ancient existance.”

Elide resumed washing her body. “Well, I think it has been well established that I am not just anyone.”

Lorcan couldn’t argue with that. The two went back to washing and brushing. When she was finished, Lorcan pulled her from the tub and placed her by the counter with her towel. He helped her dry enough that she could sit on the counter and finish herself.

“We should bring a chair in here,” Elide said. Lorcan nodded quickly before dunking himself until the water. He rose a moment later, his dark hair plastered to his face, his chest glistening with water and soap. When Lorcan caught her staring Elide continued to brush her wet hair.

“A chair would be better than the counter.” Lorcan said, picking up the conversation where they left off. “I can have an old chair pulled from storage, one that won’t be missed if it became damaged.”

Elide was impressed by Lorcan’s efficiency. Five minutes flat and he was out of the tub, drying himself before collecting Elide to be taken into the bedroom. She’d barely had time to brush her teeth before he’d whisked her away. Her old morning routine usually took longer. She used to wake up with Lorcan, but instead of training she spent the extra time to soak in the tub, or sluggishly pick out her clothes for the day. Some mornings Lorcan would return to find Elide napping at the end of the bed, half dressed and hair still in a towel.

After being treated like a doll for so long, Elide was thankful that she could manage to dress herself. Elide had wished she’d had time to find some better clothes for the healing process, but for now she just had some loose trousers and a white shirt one of the maid’s had offered for the time being. If they weren’t so tight, Elide would don her Witch’s leathers, but Yrene would make her change out of them as soon as she put them on.

A breakfast tray had been left on the bed for Elide and Lorcan. Lorcan ate bit bites as he continued to dress himself, but Elide only nibbled on some toast and fruit.

“What time is it?” Elide asked, too afraid to look at the clock on her nightstand.

Lorcan checked his clock, “Seven forty-seven. Chaol and I should be—”

Elide took in a deep breath, then blew it out. That knot that had started to build earlier was growing tighter and tighter. Lorcan was at her side in a second, his massive hand stroked her back.

“Are you alright?” Lorcan asked.

Elide gave a tight nod, “Nervous.”

“Because of your lesson?” Elide nodded. “Anything specific about your lessons your nervous about?” She shook her head.

“It’s just daunting.” Elide confessed, “To be an adult, a full Lady of Perranth, a member of the queen’s court and council, and to have to admit to yourself that you need to be treated like a child.”

“Lynoel is not going to treat you like a child.” Lorcan told her, “He is too scared of you to belittle you like that.”

Elide smiled. Lynoel was confident in his interviews whenever he was discussing himself and his research. However, whenever he had to address Elide directly while she was staring him down at the Lady of Perranth he became nervous and flustered. Lorcan liked to tell her that when she commanded a room like that people often reek of fear more when they looked at Elide than when they met his own stare.

“He’s a good person, and he understands he is not teaching a child, nor is he teaching someone who will put up with even the slightest transgression towards them. Now, if it would make you feel better I can stay for the first lesson, just to make sure you feel confident in yourself.”

“No, you need to return to the people today. I’m sure the council has made a decision for you and Chaol by now.”

Lorcan kissed her forehead lovingly. “You’ll do great in your lessons today,” he assured her.

Lorcan stood from the bed and went to the door, opening it a mere second after someone knocked. Chaol didn’t look surprised by the speed.

“Overly excited?” Chaol asked.

Lorcan tapped his pointed ears, “I heard you walking. I’ll be ready to leave shortly, I was just waiting for Lynoel.”

“You don’t have to wait.” Elide said, “Just help me elevate and I’ll be set for the morning.”

“Yrene will be here in just a moment to check in on you,” Chaol told Elide.

Before she could ask, Yrene walked into the room, and made her excused. “I had to pee for the third time this morning. Pregnancy is amazing. Now,” she stepped up to the bed and began sending her magic into Elide’s ankle. “How are you feeling?”

“Fine. The healed ankle feels a little bruised, but that’s nothing I can’t handle.”

“Completely normal.” The healer stated. “Any other complaints or troubles?”

“I removed it from the sling for about four hours last night.” Elide confessed.

Yrene grinned, “I could tell. Couldn’t get comfortable?”

“No. And I was already feeling restless after I’d slept so long during the day.”

“Well, the good news is you won’t have to endure that much healing at once again, so your rests won’t be so long. I’ll still have some chamomile tea sent up for you to drink thirty minutes before bed, just to help you fall asleep.”

She looked down at the round pillow at the foot of Elide’s bed.

“I use it normally to prop my ankle up at night.” She explained.

“Not a bad idea. Some more height wouldn’t hurt, but a good alternative to the sling if you really can’t sleep in it.”

Suddenly remembering Chaol and Lorcan, Yrene turned her attention to them. “Don’t you two have somewhere to be?”

Lorcan rolled his eyes. “I'd like to be a part of my wife’s healing process.”

“I’ll tell you about it later.” Elide assured him. “Now run off, or you’ll be late. It won’t look good on Chaol if he’s late for his first day of rebuilding.”

Chaol and Lorcan walked over to kiss their wives goodbye. Chaol even brought Yrene’s stool next to the bed. Then, they were gone, off to help the general public.

Elide murmered, “So fussy.”

“I’ll say.” Yrene added. “Also, if you ever don’t want someone in the room during the healing process, you have every right to tell them to get the hell out. Or ask me to do it, I love making people leave the room.”

“I will.”

“Back to your ankle, the set has held, but it’s still fragile. So, be careful.” Yrene stood and carried her stool back to it’s spot by the wall. “I’d like to start alternating elevation with icing—”

The conversation was interrupted by Lynoel’s tentative knock. Elide nodded at Yrene, and she swung open the door.


	6. Chapter 6

“Lady Westfall,” Lynoel said with a short and quick bow.

“Yrene, please.”

Lynoel either didn’t hear, or refused to accept the request, either way he bowed to Elide. “Lady Lochan.”

Elide wasn’t sure she knew Lynoel enough to ask him to call her Elide. Even if she was his student, the formality helped her keep her chin up when she just wanted to curl up in herself.

“Hello Lynoel.” Elide beckoned, “Please, come in.”

“Thank you, Lady. I have a few things to set up and then we can begin when you are ready.” The young man went to setting up an easel, his hands shaking just enough to make the work more difficult.

“Elide,” Yrene said calling the woman’s attention. “I am going downstairs to get the ice bags, I’ll be back in just a moment.”

Elide gave her a nod and she was off, leaving the door open.

“How are you doing this morning, Lynoel?” Elide asked, trying to ease both his nerves and her own.

Lynoel paused his efforts to look to her. “I am very well, thank you my Lady.”

“Your rooms are comfortable enough?”

“More than I expected,” Lynoel said.

“I hear you may prefer the library to your room. Should we move the bed there?”

Lynoel stood up straight, his face had blanched. “No, no, it’s not that I find the rooms inhospitable—I would never disrespect your kindness like so—”

Elide lifted a hand and smiled, “I was just kidding, Lynoel. I was kidding. I know you’re grateful, and I can’t be angry at somebody giving those books some much deserved attention. Feel free to explore them as much as you like.”

Relief swept over Lynoel’s face. He huffed a laugh out, “Thank you, ma’am.” Returning to adjusting the easel’s positioning Lynoel asked, “How are you this morning?”

“Also very well,” Elide told him.

Lynoel finished setting his chalk board up on the easel, then he turned to Elide. “Feeling nervous? Most of my students experience some first day anxiety, it’s very normal.”

“I’ve never really been a student,” Elide told him. “My nursemaid didn’t hold regular classes, she just taught me what I needed to know whenever it came up. Except literacy, of course.”

Lynoel gave a deep nod that could’ve passed for a bow. “I understand.” Something like guilt or sorrow flashed across the tutor’s face, but before Elide could inquire about it Yrene re-entered.

“Sorry to interrupt class,” Yrene said as she strode over to Elide.

“No, we were just about to get started.” Lynoel said. He began digging through his bag, putting his back to the women while Yrene placed the ice around Elide’s ankle. She hissed at the contact, but eventually settled.

Lynoel cleared his throat, his cheeks were turning red. “I hope you don’t find me unprofessional, but it would seem the teacher is suffering from some first day nerves and has forgotten his chalk.”

Elide gave him a genuinely kind smile, “That is alright. Go fetch it and we can start.”

Lynoel rushed from the room, his cheeks still red as a tomato. Elide’s gaze followed him, noticing the slight bulge in his front pocket that looked exactly like two pieces of chalk.

“I’ve done that before.” Yrene said. “Only it wasn’t chalk. It was the cadaver.”

“Remember when you said if I wanted someone to leave, I could tell them?”

Yrene raised her eyebrows and was quickly on her feet.

Elide gripped the healer’s arm to keep her from leaving while she corrected herself, “No, no, not you.”

“Oh,” Yrene said, her eyebrows now knotting together tightly. “You mean Lynoel? Did he do something wrong?”

“No,” Elide again said. “I don’t want anyone to leave. I was just wondering if the same policy applied if I wanted someone to stay. Just for a little while.”

Yrene understood now. “I have some paperwork I can do this morning. I’ll go fetch it.”

Quickly waddling away Yrene left the room. She returned a second before Lynoel, who was out of breath, but holding up his chalk in victory.

“If it’s alright with you,” Yrene said to the tutor, “I am going to be observing Lady Lochan’s ankle this morning. I’ll keep quiet, work on my own things, but I’d like to be near her in case she needs me. We did some major healing yesterday, so I need to be sure it’s progressing correctly.”

“Of course,” Lynoel said, giving his signature nervous bow. “If that is alright with Lady Lochan, then it’s alright with me.”

“It is.”

“Let’s begin.” Lynoel handed Elide a small chalk board and a fresh piece of chalk. “Lord Lochan told me you can sign your name. Do you mind showing me on your board?”

Elide shook her head and went to sign her name. She did it slowly, as always, to concentrate on the foreign feeling of gripping her writing utensils, and moving her hand and arm in a way that elegantly drew her name.

Lady Elide Lochan

Her d’s and h’s were shaky, but it was a mostly passable signature. Whenever Lorcan was required to sign next to her she often felt inferior to the confident swirls and flourishes of his own signature. She figured once she mastered the basics, she too could have such a fanciful signature.

Lynoel picked up the board and looked closely at her work. “Very nice,” he commented. “This is a good start to our work.”

He erased the signature and returned the board to her. “Next, could you write the alphabet for me? Or as much of it as you can. Write it upper or lower cased, don’t worry about speed or neatness, just show me what you can.”

Elide looked over at Yrene, who was squinty at a piece of paper like she couldn’t believe what was written on it, and absently rubbing her belly. The healer was very good at being present for Elide while also giving her privacy.

“I know the alphabet,” Elide said softly, “But, I’m not sure I can write every letter.”

Lynoel picked up his own chalk and stepped to his board. “Would it help if I wrote it on the board and you copied?”

Silently she nodded, and Lynoel began. She followed as best she could, but a few letters were no better than pitiful squiggles or misshaped lines. They went through the capitals first, and then the lower cases. Elide was proud when she realized she’d doubted herself and that she knew more of her letters than she had thought. It was just a matter of getting her hand to figure out the motions of writing, and then to make it legible.

“You are doing great, Elide.” Lynoel told her. “I am not surprised at how well you are doing, but I think you are.”

Yrene’s eyes shot up from her paper when she heard that. Elide knew the woman was thinking this conversation was good for her soul wound.

“I am just being reasonable.” Elide said, “And you don’t want a student that is overly confident, I’m sure.”

“Not overly, but confidence helps. Otherwise you’re going to be stuck in a state of pity and it’ll be harder for me to teach you.”

Yrene had completely removed her attention from her papers to Elide. She was agreeing with Lynoel. She was an educator she understood this, and the philosophy applied to healing, too.

“I’ll work on it,” Elide told both of them.

“Good.” Lyneol turned to the board and wrote down a few words. While he did so, Yrene gave Elide’s leg an encouraging pat.

“Would you mind reading any of these words for me?”

Elide looked at the board and studied the still new letters. She immediately recognized her own name and Lorcan’s. When she went to sound out a few of the smaller words, “B-b-a—” she became suddenly aware of Yrene. She froze and pretended to be reading them silently.

Yrene was still focused on her work, but Lynoel was aware of his student.

“I’m sorry to have to ask this, Lady Westfall.” Lynoel said, “But it would appear I also left a book I need in my room.”

Yrene looked up, surprised by the address. A quick glance between Elide, the board, and Lynoel, and she understood.

“No, not a problem. I need to pee again, anyways. And get a snack. Would you all like anything while I slowly do these tasks?”

Elide shook her head. She felt better now that there wouldn’t be an audience, but her cheeks were still heating now that both of them had acknowledge her insecurity. Once the door clicked behind Yrene, Elide looked back at the board. If she could impale Earawan to the floor of that tower, she could admit she didn’t know a damn word on that board beyond the names.

“Those aren’t the only names on the board.” Lynoel said. He pointed to two words with his chalk. He walked her through each letter’s sound and had her follow along. She knew she was still blushing but Elide set her shoulders square and her back straight, she could do this.

“West,” Elide completed the first word. Then the second, “Fall.” She smiled, “Westfall.”

“Exactly.” Lynoel underlined the two words. “I thought that would be a fun way to learn those two words. Now, that brings an end to the names on the board, so let’s try sounding out some more.”

And so they did. Elide tried and failed time and time again, but Lynoel never faltered. He never shamed her, or grew frustrated when she spent three entire minutes trying to sound out the word, “Shoe.” He kept encouraging her, and helping her work through the harder sounds.

“It’s a little ridiculous that I know all of these words.” Elide told him when they’d finished them all. “I can pronounce them, I can define them, but when they’re written I am completely lost.”

“It’s not ridiculous.” Lynoel said.

“You have to admit—”  
“No,” Lynoel said. The word shocked Elide she was at a loss for words. “I don’t have to admit that. Because I don’t agree. I think many people underappreciate literacy. They take it as something everyone should know because they hardly remember learning it. Yet, it is a privilege to get to learn, and it shouldn’t be taken for granted. I don’t judge anyone who is illiterate, because I understand that it is hard to learn, even as children, and not everyone can afford to learn. The written language is a marvelous way to communicate, and I will teach it to anyone who is willing to learn. But I will never think it’s ridiculous that someone cannot.”

Elide’s teeth clanked together, her jaw had dropped and that wasn’t a very ladylike expression to give to someone.

“I apologize, Lady Lochan, if that was out of term.”

“Don’t apologize for that.” She told him, “I needed to hear it.”

“Illiteracy doesn’t mean stupidity,” he continued. “I know you have been blessed by Annieth herself, and your history is full of ingenious plans and heroics. And I promise you I’m not just saying this because it is you, Lady. I am also saying it because my mother and my aunt are—were illiterate.”

“They didn’t survive the war?” Elide asked.

“They didn’t survive Lord Vernon.” Lynoel admitted. That look of shame and guilt shaded Lynoel’s face. “If I may be so bold to say.”

“I expect all of my citizens to be this hard on Vernon.” Elide said, “I know I will never forgive him or find a reason to pity him when he did so much damage to Perranth and Terrasan.”

Lynoel let out a deep sigh. “Well, creative swear words and names to call Vernon are in next weeks lessons, but for now, let’s continue with today’s lesson.”

Yrene checked in on Elide just before lunch. She hadn’t returned to the room until she’d spotted Lynoel leaving. He’d left Elide with a packet of papers. On each page Lynoel had drawn out the alphabet in dotted lines and gave Elide the task of tracing them, then writing them her own. This was to help clean up her handwriting and to develop the fine motor skill of writing.

The lesson only lasted until ten this morning, but by then the ice at her feet had melted. Yrene entered the room and began talking healing. She fixed Elide’s ankle in the sling and promised to return with fresh ice in a few hours.

“Thanks for sitting in on the first lesson,” Elide told her. “You don’t have to sit in on any others, but appreciate what you did today.”

“You just say the word,” Yrene said, “And I’ll sit in on anything you want me to. I’m the one who has immobilized you, so it’s the least I can do.”

“How is your paperwork coming along?”

Yrene arched and placed a hand on the small of her back.

“Slowly,” she told Elide. “I much prefer hands-on work, but for now I am muddling through this endless paperwork. I did receive an interesting letter from Qwenta, though.”

“What did it say?”

“She wants to meet with me, which I expected, but it would appear she is not the only one. She’s already reached out to every person she knows in this city who would like to learn more about healing, and they’ve reached out to others, and so on and so on. Anyways, she would like to know when I would be available to host a gathering and lecture to these people.”

Elide’s stomach fluttered with joy. She had always loved her city, but to see them reaching out to each other and being so eager to better themselves. It was something amazing, and she knew it.

“Wow, that’s big. I wish I could go, but I doubt my healer will let me.”

Yrene snorted. “I am pleased with this response. There have been some cities that I’ve contacted that refuse to name their healers. What the king did damaged them too badly. But, I’m sure they’ll come around. Once the Torre is established I hope to have this response in any city I visit.”

“How many people did Qwenta estimate?”

“Forty.” Yrene said, “It might not sound like a lot, but I would’ve been stunned if she’d told me four others had responded.”

“I really would like to come,” Elide said. “Even if you just want to show off my ankle to the new healers. I’d love to meet my city’s potential healers, to rally them to get their education and help us all heal.”

Yrene pursed her lips and put a hand on Elide’s ankle. “I might be able to schedule it around your healing, but I won’t make the call until we’re closer.”

“If I’m not healed enough, just parade them through the hallway and I’ll wave at them from my bed.”

“Deal.”

An hour and half a later a different kind of parade came to Elide’s hallway. She’d asked Yrene to leave the door open so she could wave down any maid or butler that passed by, should she need them. Telly came to take her lunch request a few minutes prior, and to inform Elide Lord Lorcan was going to try to be home for lunch, but he and Lord Chaol were very busy.

Telly didn’t have any other information beyond that, but Elide soon figured it out when the smell hit her before she saw the Lords. By the time Lorcan’s towering build filled the doorway Elide already had her nose pinched and mouth covered. Chaol was behind him, and both men looked as bad as they smelled.

“What the hell did the council send you all to do?” Elide asked through her fingers.

“A few miles outside the city there are six farmers clustered together. They needed everything done.” Lorcan answered, he leaned against the doorframe and pulled off his boots.

“We finished, so we don’t have to go back.” Chaol said, also removing his boots.

“Thank Hellas,” Lorcan said to the god that no longer harkened over his shoulder.

A door creaked open down the hall, but gagging followed in form of greeting. Chaol dropped his boots and raced down the hall to the sound. His limp was pronounced, and Elide hoped Lorcan hadn’t worked him too hard.

Elide could hear Yrene’s voice, but it quickly faded, likely to the bathroom. Chaol yelled at her from the hallway, but Elide didn’t hear him rush to her side.

“You finished?” Elide asked, leaning further against the headboard trying to escape the smell.

“Yes.” Lorcan said, peeling his shirt off but not moving beyond the threshold. “Turns out a pretty sizeable group of workers has banded together to assist me. So, the council assigns me a place to go, and I bring the workers with me. It’s kind of like being a commander again, but more horse shit.” Lorcan shook his hair, and a few pieces of hay fell onto the floor.

“What are you doing?” Elide asked when Lorcan went for his belt buckle.

“Aretta saw Chaol and I walking home. She caught us in the stairwell and scolded us for being so filthy.”

Elide hoped Chaol didn’t find her housekeeper to be too forward. Elide had chosen Aretta because she was strong willed and unafraid to say her piece. After being abused and basically enslaved Elide wanted a head housekeeper who would be willing to stand up for herself and her workers.

“Then,” Lorcan continued, tugging his belt lose. “She said if we got any dirt on the carpets in the rooms we would be forced to hang every carpet in the castle on a line and beat the dust out of them. So, we agreed to strip before we entered.”

“Oh,” Elide’s eyes went wide when Lorcan actually removed his pants and undershorts. He stepped into the room, hiding himself.

“Great work today, Chaol.” Lorcan shouted from the room. “Take the rest of the day off.”

“Tell him he can use the bathroom in the rooms next to his, should Yrene need the space.”

Lorcan said so, but by then Chaol was already halfway in his own rooms headed towards Yrene. The door closed, and not too long after Elide heard feet scurrying the hallway to collect the discarded clothes.

“I should give the laundresses a bonus for handling those clothes.”

The smell was less powerful, but it still clung to Lorcan’s body and hair. The male must’ve been just as disgusted by his own smell that he ignored the comment and headed straight for the bathroom.

Lunch arrived while Lorcan was still scrubbing. He’d closed the door, but Elide could hear him drain and refill the tub twice before he re-entered.

“That’s much better.” Elide said, “I can now allow you to give me a kiss.”

Lorcan obliged before settling into the bed next to Elide.

“How was your lesson?” Lorcan asked before he stuffed his face with food. Elide watched for a moment, impressed by how much food fit in his mouth.

Finally, she answered. “It went well. I asked Yrene to stay, but I don’t think I’ll need her any more.”

Through his food Lorcan said, “I offered to stay.”

“Just because one of us is stuck in this room doesn’t mean both of us should be. We still have duties to our people.” Before he could swallow and give a harrowing speech about how Elide was his first duty, Elide continued. “Lynoel said everyone is nervous on their first day, and was nothing but patient and encouraging during our lesson.”

“Good.” Lorcan said, but he didn’t reach for another bite. “How are you feeling about them?”

Elide shrugged. “It’s not as bad as I thought. Lynoel and Yrene helped me today.”

“But?”

The Lady shrugged again. She didn’t know how to voice the endless doubt she had. She was doing very good at masking it, as she always had. Until she could read more than her own name, she wasn’t sure she’d be able to stop kicking herself for her illiteracy.

Lorcan, the king of hiding his true feelings, didn’t remove his eyes from her. She knew he wanted to demand she tell him her thoughts, it was his automatic response.

After a long stretch of quiet Lorcan said, “When you’re ready.”

Both resumed eating, Elide only pausing between bites to rest her head against Lorcan’s shoulder. She wasn’t ready, but she needed to let him know she still trusted him.

“No mail so far,” Elide noted.

Lorcan shook his head. “I checked with Merrik when I came home. He said he’d bring it up after we ate.”

Elide snapped her head to look at Lorcan. “He withheld my mail?”

Lorcan put his fork down. “He didn’t know if he was allowed to interrupt you.”

“Oh.” Elide said, she hadn’t set boundaries for the service staff during her recovery. They all probably assumed she wasn’t to be disturbed during her lessons, and didn’t know what restritctions Yrene had set. “When Merrik comes up, we’ll talk.”

“What would you like for them to do?”

Elide considered the options. “When I’m having a lesson, they should leave the mail outside the door, maybe in a basket. This way I can collect it afterwards, and eventually I will be able to read them on my own.” The thought made Elide feel invigorated, she would work on her letters again after lunch, maybe even try to spell out any words she could remember from the board. “If it’s urgent, they can knock and I’ll have to allow Lynoel to read what I cannot. Or Yrene if she’s nearby. Same system for healing.”

“What about in between your lessons and healings?”

“After healings it will be Yrene’s call. Otherwise, if the door is closed I should be left undisturbed. I can ring for Telly if I need someone. I left the door open today, when that happens I am open to disturbances from the staff. Any visitors should be kept downstairs until either you, me, or Yrene decide if I should meet with them.”

Lorcan gave Elide a playful smile, “And if Aelin herself comes?”

Elide grunted, “I think you and I both know the Queen will not be left waiting, no matter who stands in her way. But, she is not coming, not if she had planned on hosting an assembly. She’ll have to do the assembly without me, or postpone it until next month when I can travel.”

“Ah, here he comes.” Lorcan said, announcing the footman before he had an opportunity to knock. “Come in, Merrik.”


	7. Chapter 7

Lorcan was able to stay for a few hours to help sort Elide’s mail, and draft a response to anyone who questioned Lorcan’s authority while Elide was indisposed. While they worked out the fine details she thought to herself that she could just write that Lorcan was qualified enough for the task because he’d already had a hand in every piece of business Elide had handled since becoming Lady officially.

However, her husband only frowned at her when she made the suggestion aloud.

Instead they went with a more formal wording, and sent it to two barons who had already voiced discomfort in giving Lorcan so much power.

“I should be leaving now,” Lorcan stretched from sitting at the desk for so long. “Do you need anything before I go? One more trip?”

“No,” Elide said. “I should be fine, you’ll be up before dinner?”

“If I can.” Lorcan said. “I have a meeting with a Mister Farrow Deavin—”

“The man who wanted financial assistance for repairs on his summer home? Don’t argue with this man,” Elide said, “Just glare at him until he cowers away. That’s what I had planned on doing during the meeting. It’s completely ridiculous to ask for such things when the walls of this city are in piles of rubble, families are still struggling to keep food on the table, and not to mention I have been vocally advocating for business relief so we can re-open the market at it’s full capacity. I mean this guy is being absolutely deaf to what is going on around him!”

“Woah, don’t get too worked up right before I start working on your ankle.”

Elide had been so caught up in her rant she hadn’t noticed Yrene arrive with a fresh ice pack for her ankle.

“I just need to make sure Lord Lorcan is on the same page as me on this issue.”

“I am,” Lorcan said defensively. “I will not be giving this man any money. I’ve done my research, Deavin has a reputation as a penny pincher. Most people who know him believe he has the money to do the repairs, but refuses to spend any of his own money on it.”

“We give assistance to people who _actually_ need it,” Elide iterated. She had set up a committee to field through the requests, the finalist were filtered up to her and Lorcan to approve. She sat in on many of the meetings, listening when citizens came to explain their situations, often it was single mothers who had lost a husband in the war.

Many of those women teared up remembering their lost loved ones, and Elide did her best not to cry with them. She’d save her tears for when she was in her own room, regretting how useless she had been for ten years, and how her city had fallen victim to Earawan. She’d cry until Lorcan found her, and then she would cry some more because she was disgustingly happy that she wasn’t one of those women. She still had her husband.

“It’s absurd that we’re even hosting this meeting with him. Doesn’t he know our time could be used elsewhere? You could be meeting with Abbett and Gisel about the monument to those lost in the last ten years. Or attending this evening’s council—”

Lorcan came to the bed and took Elide’s chin in his hand. It was a gentle hold, more of a sentimental gesture towards their early days together, and a way for Lorcan to help Elide focus her attention back in the moment when her anger got the best of her.

“Elide, if you get any more heated you will melt your ice.”

“I’ll say,” Yrene muttered from her stool.

“I will tell Deavin you send warm regards.” With her chin still in his grip, he kissed her. “See you tonight.”

Elide crossed her arms. “Tell him I said he can take his summer home and shove it up his—”

“Lady Elide,” Yrene said. Her eyes were wide, but she grinned like a fool. “I have never heard you sound so unkind to a citizen of Perranth.”

“We’re not all angels.” Elide’s anger still prickled. “That guy has been a thorn in my ass for two weeks. I hope Lorcan can set him straight. He really does have more important things to do. We both do.”

“Yes,” Yrene said, “Which is why I’m here.”

“I’m sure Anielle isn’t a exactly a picnic. Don’t you and Chaol deal with this kind of thing all the time?”

“Oh yes. Especially from some of the more traditional citizens who don’t think the White Fang men deserve their sliver of land after they helped us win the war.”

“It just makes me so angry.” Elide wanted to hit something. When she got this riled up Lorcan usually took her out to the courtyard to spare. Though, he barely had to exert any energy to keep Elide at bay. Yet it helped her calm down, to re-focus on what was important at this moment.

“Tell me about it.” Yrene rested her hand on Elide’s shoulder, subtly leaning over to pull the rope to call up Telly.

“I just don’t understand it,” Elide knew what Yrene was doing. “How could people go through such ordeals, or at least be aware of what happened, and still only hae themselves in mind? How can he walk through this city and see the mess and still think his summer home is more important than the closed down seamstress, or the orphanage for god’s sake!”

“I don’t know.” Yrene admitted. “Some people have just been given special treatment their whole lives they don’t expect anything less.”

“Well, I’m putting my foot down on such bullshit.” Elide was so flustered she was surprised when I sob bubbled up instead of a laugh when she said, “I’m going to have you heal my ankle so I can put both my feet down.”

Telly knocked on the door just then, and Yrene quietly ordered some herbal tea for the two of them. She returned to the bed and offered her handkerchief to Elide.

“I don’t mean to blubber like a fool.”

Yrene patted her hair, “It’s okay to cry. If you keep your emotions too bottled up you’ll just make them worse. It’s better to find ways to release the frustration than to let it fester.”

Elide blew her nose. She tried to take a few deep breathes, it was silly to cry like this. Though, she had to admit it did make her feel better.

“Anything else you want to talk about?” Yrene asked.

Elide shook her head. Telly was already back with tea, and Elide made sure to thank her for her service.

“No, I think as long as Lorcan handles Deavin well I’ll have one less thing to worry about.”

Yrene pushed a cup of tea to Elide. “He will. Lorcan is a more than capable Fae Lord.”

Elide twisted the handkerchief in her hand. She set the tea down. “Maybe there is one more thing to talk about.”

Yrene looked at her over her cup, her breath pushed the steam down.

Elide bit her tongue, “I worry that I get so much push back because of Lorcan. I know he is a great leader, and I trust him with my life—I have on multiple occasions—”

“But the others don’t,” Yrene finished. For a moment Elide felt a burst of anger. Even if Yrene was a low class outsider, she probably wasn’t as disrespected as Lorcan. She was a renowned healer, and she was a woman. The other members of the Adarlan nobility either respected her service, or at least didn’t feel threatened by her.

Elide sucked in a breath, inhaling the smell of lavender and mint. She released that anger, Yrene was blameless, and she has bigger issues.

“And not just here,” Elide had kept this secret even from Lorcan for months, but she needed to come clean. “Sometimes I don’t think Aelin and her court trust him. Not fully.”

Yrene was silent. She couldn’t deny it, she had been there during the early days of the court. The way they teased him, calling him grouchy or a bastard. True as they may be, Elide wished they would looked past that like she had.

She had been guilty at not seeing the wounds Lorcan either hid or didn’t recognize. However, she had found it in her to give him the patience and space he needed to heal. To realize what he had with Maeve was not love, it was manipulation. His early years lacked compassion, leaving him unaware of the concept. From there he became a hard, ruthless warrior.

“I have a very low tolerance for the way they treat him. It would be zero, but being Queen, Aelin deserves the respect of low.” Elide blew on her tea, she’d only ever come close to breaching this topic when she’d had a few too many glasses of wine one night. “He hardly fights back, like some noble asshole. It’s like he thinks he deserves it—”

Yrene held up a hand. “His reasoning may be something he should delve out to me,” Yrene said. “However, I get the feeling that he won’t. So, let me ask you this, why does it bother you so much?”

Elide tried to sip her tea, but the water was still too hot on her lips. She blew on it instead, using the time to meditate her response.

“I have spent a lot of my life being undermined, and at times it was because I was playing a part to get what I wanted or needed. I am done with that. I am done with people thinking I made the wrong choice, just because they don’t want to take the time to understand Lorcan. It aggravates me that based on his outward history, the blind dedication to Maeve and his war record, people are fighting his position as Lord and my husband.”

“You feel that when people attack Lorcan they are also attacking you.”

Elide took a drink of tea, even though it was still scalding. She didn’t want that to be the truth, but it was. She would always fight for Lorcan, do her best to encourage people to get to know him beyond the stone-cold exterior he put up, but it boiled down to her own insecurities.

“From what I’ve seen,” Yrene said, “it seems like the citizens love him. They trust him.”

“It’s taken a lot of work.” Elide said, “And many are still nervous when he shows up to help. To an extent I get it, he’d be intimidating if I put him in a flower crown, a white tunic, and paraded him around town with a big sign that says ‘do not be afraid, I’m actually really nice’ around his neck.”

The laugh Yrene released was quickly stifled, but Elide wanted to tell her to let it out. The sound released some tension in Elide’s shoulders, made her feel lighter. Or maybe it was the conversation they were having.

“That is an image I will never forget,” Yrene admitted. “But go on, please.”

“I get it,” Elide said, “But I also don’t understand how it can last beyond the initial meeting. He’s been nothing but courteous and generous. In meetings he is stern, but it’s also obvious that he already cares a lot for this city, for the people who live here. He’s changed, I wouldn’t keep him here if he hadn’t. Yet, I still feel like certain people and fae think he hasn’t, and that it reflects poorly on me.”

“If it’s any consultation to you, I don’t think anyone has spent more than five minutes in a room with you and left thinking you a whimpering idiot.”

“Thank you.” It was all Elide could say in response. It didn’t really help, but maybe one day it would. “Maybe I should host a community event that is mandatory for all citizens and nobility. It’ll be a meet and greet Lorcan event, and I’ll host lectures on why I have fallen in love with him.”

“Does the parade happen before or after this event?” Yrene asked.

“Oh it’s the beginning of the event. Everyone watches Lorcan pass by, smiling and waving, and then follow the float into the meeting hall. There will also be a question and answer portion while Lorcan plays with a basket of puppies.”

“And an hour for anyone to come up and perform a trust fall with Lorcan?”

“Absolutely.” Elide said.

“Lorcan is a good male.” Yrene assured Elide, “He is not just sitting back and accepting hate. He is out there every day helping citizens physically rebuild their home—his home now, too—and right now he is sitting through meetings with the nobility to shut down their selfish requests. Lorcan wants their trust and affection, and he is showing each and every one of them that he is worth it. It’s only a matter of time before the others recognize it. The Lorcan of the past wouldn’t be doing this if he didn’t have a reason. And the reason is you.”

Elide picked up the handkerchief again. “I’m still going to fight anyone who tries to undermine him.”

“No, please, always stand up for what you believe. But, sometimes the root of our problems are our own fears and doubts, and those I don’t recommend burying.”

Her tea now finished, Elide placed the cup on the tray before her. “Is today all about my emotional trauma, or are you going to work on my ankle too?”

“Well, if that is your way of saying you’re done talking, then yes.” Yrene removed the tray from the bed. Elide watched her bend down to place it on the floor outside the door, her belly likely knocking her off balance. She opened her mouth to apologize that she wasn’t more helpful to Yrene, but the healer waved her off before she could begin.

“I have heard it all before,” Yrene said. “If I need help, I will ask for it.”

Elide didn’t respond. Yrene was already working the salve into her ankle, pausing to sink her magic into Elide and look around the ankle. Instead of arguing that Elide still felt guilty about putting Yrene in such a position, she focused on her breathing, preparing for another healing session.

“Today I’m going to work on scraping away the scar tissue around the original break.” Yrene warned three seconds before Elide started praying to the lost gods for mercy.

That night Elide nearly fell asleep with her fork lifted halfway to her mouth. She wanted her dinner warm, and refused to go to sleep before it was a decent hour. Her body was begging her to lay down, and she could barely keep her eyes open, but she lifted the fork over and over until her plate was empty.

The last thing she remembered was Lorcan taking her plate away while he told her to stay awake long enough to brush her teeth. Elide mumbled that she would, but waking up the following morning had her cringing at her own morning breath.

“Lorcan,” she groaned, turning her head to his side. His spot was empty, but she heard him walk out from his closet at the sound of her voice. He was dressed to train, and she’d probably just caught him before he left.

Lorcan smiled at his wife, “Good morning.”

“My mouth is disgusting.” She still felt groggy, but she might as well start her day. “You can probably smell it from there.”

Lorcan finished lacing his training shoes, and smiled. “I hate to tell you, but I can always smell your breath from this far away. Good or bad.”

Elide slapped her hand over her mouth. “That’s embarrassing.”

Lorcan rolled his eyes, he’d freed her ankle from the sling and lifted her from the bed.

“As a commander I have smelled much, much worse morning breath.” Lorcan promised her.

There was a worn wooden chair in the bathroom, right in front of the sink. It was just high enough that when Elide sat in it she could see her face over the marble counter top. There was another stepping stool next to Elide for her to place her ankle.

She gave herself a healthy amount of toothpaste as she told Lorcan, “Sure, but those soldiers weren’t trying to make sure you find them attractive.”

“Brush your teeth, woman.” Was all Lorcan said, looking a little too amused for Elide’s taste. He began filling the tub with warm water for her, probably more than ready to get started on his own morning routine. “Even with bad morning breath I find you attractive.”

Elide snorted. She was sure he wouldn’t be coming anywhere near her with this breath if she didn’t need him to carry her to the bathroom. She was going to tell him so after she’d spit the toothpaste out and rinsed. She wiped her mouth with a towel, preparing to present her argument, but was interrupted.

“Yes,” Lorcan chided, walking closer to Elide. “Having fresher breath makes it better to show you how attracted I am to you.” He started twirling a strand of Elide’s knotted hair in his finger, his other hand rubbing her shoulder enough to push the fabric of her night gown down. “But, I’d still be more than happy to experience the pleasures of the bedroom if you’d eaten nothing but onions and garlic and never brushed your teeth.”

Elide responded by putting her weight on her good ankle just long enough to get her nightgown over her head. Lorcan greedily leaned over and grabbed her breasts.

“Beautiful,” he said with a kiss to the crown of her head. “Inside and out.”

Elide couldn’t argue with him, and marveled at how special he made her feel in the span of a few words.

After a trip to the toilet, Lorcan settled Elide in the tub, and promised to retrieve her in an hour. She could ring for Telly if she needed anything, though Yrene would probably pop in sooner or later.

Elide felt like she couldn’t sink in deep enough. She’d slept good last night. The healing had been hard, but not as brutal as the first session. Yrene encouraged her to rest, but though Elide felt tired, she knew she could wait a few hours to fall asleep.

Now, she had an hour in the tub to herself. She rung for Telly shortly after getting in and ordered a pot of strong tea for her to drink during the bath. Telly, being the affectionate lady’s maid, she was, also brought Elide a plate of fresh strawberry turnovers for Elide.

When Lorcan returned he found Elide pruned, well fed, and caffeinated.

“You’d think you were on vacation.” Lorcan commented, hoisting her up from the tub.

Elide smirked. “I want you to go downstairs and thank the chef that made these. Then, I want you to tell them to apply for a business loan so they can open a pastry shop. Specialty treats is exactly what this city needs.”

“I think everyone would agree,” Lorcan said. “He could even send in his application to Orynth and I’m sure Aelin would make sure he was well taken care of.”

“How do you know it’s a he?”

“Because I spoke to him, Graen, last night after you passed out the moment I took your tray away. I wanted to make sure you had a nice little treat this morning.”

Elide blushed, filling with love for Lorcan. She pulled on his shirt until he was close enough for a kiss. “Thank you,” she told him, “that was very nice of you.”

“Anything for my Lady,” Lorcan picked up a turnover for himself. After taking a bite he said, “I’ll still talk to Graen about that pastry shop, though. Delicious.”

Elide dried her hair and watched Lorcan finish the pastry in three bites before climbing into the refilled bathtub. Two trays of their real breakfast arrived while Elide observed Lorcan’s speedy bath. He never stopped to soak, just went through the motions of washing and rinsing, a trained warrior’s method of cleaning.

“Are you ready for your lessons today?” Lorcan asked over his protein heavy breakfast.

Elide responded confidently, “Yes. I’m looking forward to it, actually.”

“Excellent.”

“Are you ready for your next work assignment?”

“Always.”

The word made her pull her shoulders a little further back, sitting up straighter. Elide asked about his meeting with Deavin as soon as he came up for dinner.

“I told him the committee will look at his application.” Lorcan told her with a certain pride that made her see red. Maybe he hadn’t changed and she should just kick his ass on the street right now.

“What the fu—”Lorcan held up a hand to stop her. His expression was cool and collected, it lacked shame for his actions. Elide waited for him to continue with pursed lips.

“I told him the committee will look at his application when two things happen. First, he has to wait until the more in need citizens are cared for which could be a few years. Second, he needs to put himself back in the good graces of his Lady. I told him that even if he couldn’t afford to fix his summer house, he was likely very capable of donating some amount of money to charity or relief efforts. If I am wrong and that’s not the case—which I am not, and it is—he could always donate his time. I even went as far as to mention those farmers down in the south who would love a few volunteers to help them get the farms running again, and to hand him a flyer to the upcoming summer festival next month that needs volunteer serves and donations.”

Elide’s jaw had gone slack. She tried to form words, but all that came out was a kind of squeak from the back of her throat. Lorcan smirked and waited, but when Elide couldn’t come up with a response, she pulled him in for a kiss.

“I am one lucky Lady to have you as my Lord.” Elide told him. “You fit the role well, and don’t let any one say otherwise.”

“If they do should I will send them your way,” Lorcan told her.

Lorcan looked at his clock, and frowned. It was nearly eight, meaning Lynoel would appear and Lorcan would be sent off on his next work assignment. Lorcan opened the door, and shortly after Chaol stepped into view with Yrene at his side. The latter had Elide’s ice ready, and set to her usual routine of asking about her ankle as she placed the bags around her ankle. The swelling was going down after all the time off her ankle, and from Yrene’s healings.

Chaol and Lorcan set off to find out what part of the city needed their help the most today. Then, just after Elide’s clock chimed eight, Lynoel walked in, and Yrene made her exit. The healer had a meeting scheduled with Qwenta, Merrik’s sister, and she was excited to meet a prospective student.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you've noticed sporadic use of indents before a paragraph, I apologize. I know how indents work, but they don't always translate when I copy and paste a chapter from Word to the Archive's doc. I just don't have the patience to sit and fix all of the missing indents. It bothers me, so I just thought I'd let you all know I'm not an idiot, just a little lazy when it comes to adjusting format... oops. 
> 
> Anyways, I hope you all are enjoying reading this story! I'll keep posting, but I am about to start some serious course work. So, if I'm a day late or just forget I apologize ahead of time. But I'm excited to get my full fic published! Okay, bye for now!


	8. Chapter 8

After goodbyes to Yrene, the student and tutor were left alone. “Good morning, Lady Lochan, how are you this morning?” 

“Elide,” the Lady corrected. She was feeling more comfortable with him, and she might as well admit that she didn’t need to hide behind her title. This lanky young man will treat her kindly and with respect.

That certain young man, however, looked at her with his mouth slightly agape.

“Please,” she encouraged. “Call me Elide.”

Lynoel nodded until he could form the word, “As you wish, Elide.”

“Shall we begin?” Elide asked, picking up her piece of chalk and waving it.

“Yes, let’s.” He said, mimicking her action. “We have lots to do today. Did you work on the handouts I gave you?”

Elide handed Lynoel her papers. Her fingers ached after so much work, but she pushed through and even did some extra practice on the back of the pages. She knew her writing was nowhere neat and precise as other nobility, so she was determined to master it and no longer be the outsider.

Lynoel praised her efforts while he examined each page. He circled a few letters for Elide to continue to master, but otherwise deemed her proficient enough to begin forming words with her letters.

“We’ll start with copying words down. Then, I’m going to give you a list to learn for a test.” Noticing Elide’s enlarged eyes Lynoel assured her, “It won’t be anything major. Just a few words at a time, and they will be the keystone to further spelling.”

“Of course.” Elide looked at her empty chalk board. She could do this, she was Elide Lochan, daughter of Marion and Cal Lochan, and Lady of Perranth. A little test wouldn’t frighten her. Spelling wouldn’t intimidate her.

“As I said yesterday, I hope these in person lessons will give you a strong foundation so you can improve your skills independently. Spelling, however, is going to be the hardest part of these lessons because it is best when the word is verbalized and based on the sound you can spell. Reading will help, it familiarizes you with the look of words. Then, it’s all about practice. Even with literature the more you do it, the better you become.”

“Well then, let’s begin that practice.”

Lynoel smiled and turned to the board. As he wrote each letter he said them aloud, once the word was finalized he sounded it out for Elide, until a mess of letters and noises became a coherent word.

They did this over and over, Lynoel gave Elide the task of saying the letters and sounding out the word. Her cheeks were often burning bright red, she wanted to be good at this, but it was harder than it looked. However, Lynoel continued to push her, giving her praise when she succeeded, and compassion when she became frustrated.

“Do you like poetry?” Lynoel asked, digging through his books.

“I can’t say I’ve had the time to appreciate it,” she said. “My nursemaid didn’t know much poetry beyond nursery rhymes. War didn’t really allow for the peace and quiet required to enjoy a sonnet.”

He pulled out a small book and gave it to Elide, smiling as he did.

“If literacy is a luxury, then poetry is indeed a solid gold castle.” Saying so made Lynoel blush, “Sorry, Lady, that was a little arrogant of me to describe poetry with a blatant metaphor.”

Elide spoke lightly, “Perhaps you sit on the throne of that castle with such language. I am not offended. Though, it’s Elide, not Lady.”

Elide already had her thumb in the book and flipped through it. It wasn’t very thick, and each page only had a handful of words confined to the left side.

“This is a collection of short poems.” Lynoel explained. “The words are few and simple enough that I think you can work your way through a poem or two a day. Feel free to write in the book, it’s yours to keep.”

Elide ran her fingers over a poem in the middle of the book. It was daunting to be challenge to translate these foreign words, yet she was thrilled to be given such an assignment.

“There are no assignments with this book,” Lynoel continued. “I won’t be checking anything unless you want me to. This is for you to use in your free time. Copy the words, work on reading the poems, circle words you don’t know and then write down the definition.”

Elide looked towards the dictionary on her bedside table. Lynoel had placed it there yesterday, another tome for her to peruse or ignore. Looking back to the sparse words she realized this was the alternative to giving her a children’s story book. It made Elide sit up straighter. She wasn’t a child, she was an adult learning to read and deserved adult books.

“There is no pressure to try and comprehend the poems. Unless you are feeling truly ambitious. Poetry can be very insightful, but it can also just be nonsense.”

“I would think the king of poetry castle would speak more highly of the form.” Elide teased.

“Being passionate about literature doesn’t mean I can’t criticize it. Poetry is subjective, it’s all about the reader and their life experiences. So, sometimes to some people, it is just nonsense.”

“While to others it is the work of a god.” Elide looked at the painting of a clear valley, bright greens and blues with only a few interruptions of pink and yellow. “Like art.”

“Exactly. Poetry is visual art written. You’re catching on very well, maybe one day I will invite you to my castle.”

“I look forward to beholding your solid gold walls.” Elide placed her book of poetry atop her dictionary, she would indeed be digging through them later. “Do you have a favorite poem?”

Lynoel considered. “I have several. Would you like the long, daunting ode written by an ancient poet, or a short, playful poem that I keep close to my heart for sentimental reasons?”

“The sentimental one.”

“Wise choice.” Lynoel cleared his throat, then he recited the poem.

“ _A birdie with a yellow bill_

_Hopped on my windowsill_

_Cocked his shining eye and said:_

_‘Ain’t you ‘shamed, you sleep-head!’”_

“I know that one,” Elide said. A hundred memories were tugging at her, of Finnula’s voice suddenly waking her up without warning. The nursemaid had recited this exact poem every morning in the early days of their imprisonment. It distracted her long enough from remembering where they were that she could sit up, and start her day.

“It was the first poem I memorized.” Lynoel told her, “A teacher assigned it to us, and I would say it over and over again in the morning. Drove my family crazy with it, my father would beg me to stop, but my Mother never stopped me. She would just recite it with me while I got ready for school.”

“My nursemaid used to say it to me every morning until I got out of bed.” Elide told him. “The day a little bird did land on my windowsill I stared at it and waited for it to speak. When it didn’t, Finnula told me it was because birds only speak to children when they are scolding them, but I’d been such a good little girl there was no reason to scold me.”

Lynoel looked at his feet. Elide thought she should be the one to look so pitiful at the story. She still didn’t often talk about her years in the tower, in fact the thought of the tower being so near sent a shiver down her spine. The poem was a lost artifact from those days, and made her regret not knowing what happened to Finnula even more.

“My Aunt was very kind.” Lynoel said softly, as if it explained the sad look in his eyes. “When she heard me recite the poem, and several others I’d since learned in school, she took me to the bookstore. I spent an hour just reading the titles on the shelves, and then another hour trying to pick out my favorite. In the end, my Aunt bought me three books. One, an adventure tale about pirates. Second, a large book beyond my reading level, but one I wanted to read nonetheless. And third, a book of children’s poetry with the promise of memorizing as many as I could to teach her.”

Elide could see a young Lynoel lingering at the shelves, carefully handling each book that he was anxious to devour. Bookstores had been plentiful in her childhood, and Elide remembered flipping through picture books with other children on more than one occasion. Those outings with her parents often ended in stops at a sweets shop where Elide would get a bag of gummies, and her parents would quietly offer to pay for any other children who were in the shop to have a bag of candy.

Those were the golden days of Perranth, Elide thought. She was going to bring them back, it might take years, but she was willing to do whatever it took. Starting with the task at hand.

Elide was perfectly pleased to continue in her routines. She was itching to get out of bed, to rejoin society, but she was feeling more and more accomplished with every day. She and Lynoel made slow progressions in their lessons, and though Elide’s hand ached every day, she could also feel it getting stronger, her word recognition growing more and more. Yrene continued to work on her scar tissue, and let Elide touch her belly whenever the baby kicked.

Lorcan was working more than ever, balancing his physical labor with tiresome council meetings and debates. Elide listened to his recaps of his day and gave her insight on the workings of her city leaders. Her spelling wasn’t great, but Elide could draft a few letters and documents without Lorcan’s help, easing his load there. At night she would whisper to him how excited she was to be back on her feet, so she and Lorcan could take on rebuilding together once again. Lorcan’s response was usually snores, but if not he would paint her pictures of how grand that life will be, Elide spearheading the efforts, and Lorcan at her side fighting just as fiercely.

On the fifth day of her three weeks, Elide asked Yrene when she could leave the room. She was getting antsy to see Perranth beyond just her view from the balcony.

Yrene paused rolling up her sleeves and looked at Lorcan. He had just dressed in a fine tunic for a meeting, and it made Elide antsy to do another activity she was restricted from.

Yrene’s voice drew her out of her fantasy and back to the present. “If Lorcan is willing to carry you to the garden, I could borrow Chaol’s chair for you.”

Elide’s face lit up. If she wanted to jump up and down, but she knew that would be the end of any such treats from Yrene.

“I’m always more than willing to carry Elide.” Lorcan shrugged off his jacket.

“I’ll go get the chair.”

Elide had Lorcan help her into a fresh shirt and trousers, not wanting to go downstairs in her wrinkled clothing. They’d finally had clothes ordered and delivered to Elide, they made her feel normal and not like she was just being lazy in bed.

Lorcan scooped her into his arms, and the excitement of leaving the room had Elide giddy.

“I feel like I’m top of the world.” Elide said.

“That’s just because you’re not used to being up this high.” Lorcan teased, inciting Elide to smack his shoulder. However, his dark chuckle incited her to put a hand on his cheek and turn his head for a kiss.

When Yrene returned with the chair she found the couple still lip locked.

Yrene groaned, “Okay you two lovebirds, let’s go.”

Elide blushed, but refused to wipe the smug smile off her face as Lorcan carried her downstairs.

“I thought I’d never see these walls again,” Elide said jokingly. “I want to see the world again!”

“Will the garden do? And maybe a trip to the library to disturb Lynoel?”

“For today, that can count as the world.” Elide laughed, feeling drunk on this little bit of freedom. Elide kept her smile, but the dimness of the stairwell reminded her of another time she thought she’d been freed in this castle.

Once on the first floor, Lorcan sat Elide into the chair. He had noticed her change when it first happened, and now that he could look her in the eye he silently asked.

Elide’s eyes were misty, but she took in her surroundings. There were large vases full of brightly colored flowers, any staff that walked by smiled at their recovering Lady, and Lorcan was squeezing her hand.

Elide smiled, it was somber, but it was also a step in the right direction.

“I am not a prisoner anymore,” was all that Elide said before patting her husband’s hand to signify for him to stand. A final kiss on the forehead he stood before her.

Yrene stepped closer. “If you ever need a day outside, just say the word. It’s not my intention to keep you locked up or confined.”

“Thank you.” Elide took Yrene’s hand. “I know you didn’t. I didn’t even make the connection until the stairwell.”

Lorcan gave his wife one more look over, assessing that she was indeed alright. “Come fetch me when you’re ready to return upstairs.”

Elide pushed herself through the halls. It was harder than it looked, and Yrene had to step in to steer more than once. By the time they reached the garden Elide was out of breath and her heart was racing.

Yrene noticed her efforts and frowned. “We’ll start an upper-body regiment, I don’t want you to be completely out of shape but the time this is over.”

“I don’t believe I have ever been _in_ shape.” Elide countered. “Lorcan has tried to train me, but he is a little too intimidating of a training partner.”

“I’m sure there is someone else in this city that would be capable of taking you under their wing. Just find the exercise version of Lynoel and you’ll be fine.”

Elide mulled over the thought. “That’s not a bad idea. And after three weeks of being on my ass I’m sure I’ll be happy to do anything that involves standing on my two feet.”

“Two good ankles,” Yrene mused, “That’s the goal. Alright, let us take in the sights of the garden before we begin.”


	9. Chapter 9

Elide was getting better at staying awake after her healing sessions with Yrene. It was getting more and more bearable with every day to withstand the pain. Elide still yelled periodically, drawing the protective attention of her staff, but she persevered every day.

Tonight’s healing was less than it had been previously. Yrene was trying to jumpstart Elide’s ankle mobility by alternating scraping and moving the ankle. Elide struggled to move her own ankle with the pain still persistent, but something about being among the flowers encouraged her to keep going.

When she was healed, which she would be soon, she would walk through the garden and thank the flowers and bushes and trees for their silent cheers.

“Feeling up to a visit to the library?” Yrene asked.

Tired, sweaty, but revitalized by the excursion, Elide agreed. She’d only heard about Lynoel’s reverant visits to the library. Elide hadn’t hired a librarian to help with the collection, but if she knew Lynoel wasn’t so attached to the classroom she would offer him the job. When she’d told Lorcan this he laughed and said he was already making a new catalog for the library.

When Yrene rolled Elide through the shelves Elide marveled at the books. Such beautiful tomes that she would one day be able to read without assistance. Lynoel was in the far corner of the library, three neat stacks of books surrounded him while he leaned over an open book. His fingers speed along the page, he paused towards the end the page. His eyes squinted, and he raised a pen to his chin.

He looked up, deep in thought, but halfway between sitting up straight and leaning against the back of his chair he spotted Elide and Yrene.

“Lady Elide!” He shouted—well, whisper-shouted, Elide decided. Even in his excitement he respected the rules of the library. “Lady Yrene!” He was now standing, and bowing.

Both women shook their heads, it was common for them to correct him, asking the tutor to call them by their first names, and only their first names.

Elide rolled forward, “Sorry to disturb you.”

“No, no,” he quickly worked to roll down his sleeves and look more presentable. “It is your library, you can disturb me all you want. It is good to see you out and about, did you come for a book?”

“No,” Elide confessed, “I just wanted to get out of the room for a bit. I’m still working through the books you’ve given me. Reading anything interesting?” Elide nodded to the desk he’d been working at.

“Yes.” He said, “I found this essay by Tress Ulat, and it speaks most profoundly on the philosophy of rebirth. I was just taking some notes for an essay comparing the work to Meu Liffon, who currently writes and lectures on the same topic, but she has a very different approach. It’s hard to explain concisely, but I think my essay will do a fine enough job of that.”

“I’ll have to read it when you’re finished.” Elide swallowed, she could feel her exhaustion weighing on her, but she hadn’t had dinner yet and didn’t want to be rude to Lynoel.

“It’s going to mostly be about their composition differences. I want to educate people on the different methods of compelling people through written forms. Maybe even see if one author is more effective than the other and if that composition style can apply to any argument.”

She couldn’t stop it, Elide yawned. “Sorry!” She said through the yawn. “It’s not you, it’s Yrene really.”

Lynoel looked relieved to hear her say that.

“I should return upstairs.” Elide said, “Eat dinner before I pass out. See you tomorrow, Lynoel.”

“Tomorrow is Sunday,” he said. “We agreed to take Sundays off.”

“You’re right.” Elide said, “I’d forgotten. Very well, enjoy your day off.”

“See you at dinner, Lynoel.” Yrene said.

Yrene pushed Elide once again, neither wanted to expend any more of Elide’s energy. The meeting room where Lorcan was remained closed, so Yrene moved Elide to a nearby sitting room.

At the door Yrene asked the footman to have Elide’s dinner brought to the sitting room. The healer settled Elide near the fire, and dragged two chairs over to them. One chair was for Yrene, the other was for Elide’s ankle, and both of Yrene’s feet.

“You weren’t kidding,” Elide said looked at Yrene’s feet. They were just as swollen as Elide’s bad ankle got after a day of being on it.

“It’s completely normal,” Yrene explained. “I soak them every night, and Chaol is good enough to rub my feet whenever I ask.”

“Lorcan already has that job, so I’m sure he won’t mind adding another foot to it when it’s pregnancy that swells my ankles and not my broken ankle.”

Yrene sighed happily. “I love it when you talk baby plans with me. I want you, Aelin, Lysandra, Nesryn, and everyone else I know to get pregnant so I can help you along. And then we can swap experiences and insight on pregnancy and child rearing.”

“I hadn’t thought of that,” Elide said. “By the time any of these fae males get us knocked up you and Nesryn will have volumes of knowledge.”

“And we will be happy to pass it along to you.” Yrene winked.

The door opened to the sitting room and Telly walked in with a standing tray of food. She sat it next to Elide, who audibly sniffed the fine dinner before her.

“Anything for you, Lady Westfall?” Telly asked.

“No, I’ll be eating with the others later. Thank you, Telly.”

Elide was two bites in before Telly reached the door. She opened it, revealing Lorcan on the other side. He stepped aside to allow Telly through, then strode over to Elide.

“How was your tour of the world?” He asked, his hand on her shoulder.

“Wonderful.” Elide said, “But I keep getting this nagging sensation in the back of my head that there is more to the world than the garden and the library.”

“We will approach that notion another day.” Yrene said, “Eat your dinner, your eyes are going glassy.”

Elide couldn’t argue with Yrene. She dug her fork into her roasted pork, not caring for common table manners she scooped up some mashed potatoes along with her meat. Yrene and Lorcan settled into polite conversation about how Chaol did during the assignment this morning. Lorcan said he wouldn’t be surprised if the citizens asked Chaol to stay, everyone loved him so much.

“I supposed I would grow attached to anyone who volunteered to help unclog the city gutters.” Yrene observed, she smiled to herself, “Though, I guess I already have.”

Elide put her fork and knife down. The food had given her a burst of energy, but laying down on her bed sounded heavenly at the moment. Elide pushed the wheels on the chair, moving her away from the tray. She was going to bid Yrene goodnight when Merrik entered the room.

A low growl ripped from Lorcan’s throat. Elide looked at him sharply, he didn’t usually treat the staff this way.

Lorcan also didn’t do anything without reason. “Why is Fenrys here?” He asked Merrik, who now stood too dumbfounded to know what to say.

Elide grimaced, this must be something important.

“Let him in, Merrik. And take the rest of the evening off. Thank you.”

“I should go upstairs and get dressed for dinner,” Yrene made to stand from the chair. Elide held up a hand. If the queen was sending Fenrys to argue she should journey to Orynth for the assembly, then Yrene should be here.

Fenrys entered before Yrene could argue that she really didn’t need to be present. Once the male stepped into the room and had taken it in, Yrene had already given up on standing and propped her legs back up. She would be present, but she didn’t need to be a part of the conversation.

“Hello Fenrys,” Elide said. “What a lovely surprise.”

“Elide, always a pleasure,” Fenrys said, stepping forward to kiss Elide’s hand. The scars on his face flashing in the firelight. “Lorcan, you look less miserable.”

Elide met Yrene’s eyes, the comment made Elide want to scream at Fenrys. Another glance at his scars, and Elide half took the sentiment back. She knew he still mourned Connall, his twin murdered by Maeve in front of him. The Cadre had taken to calling each other brothers, but from Aelin’s letters she knew Fenrys still struggled with the sentiment. He loved them dearly, but the wound was too fresh at the moment.

However, Elide knew he would call Rowan or Vaughn brother before he called Lorcan the title. It prickled her anger, but she also felt that if anyone had a right to be unquestionably angry at Lorcan for his mistake on that beach, it was Fenrys. The aftermath of those actions led to the loss of something irreplaceable.

She resigned to open the conversation up with Yrene tomorrow. For now, Fenrys was telling Yrene how much she glowed. Elide let the conversation continue, but she could tell Lorcan was eager to hear what brought Fenrys.

“What brings you here?” Elide asked in the next pause of their dialogue. Fenrys continued to smile, his business must not be that important. He straightened up, a royal courtesan preparing to give his message.

“Queen Aelin received your letter in response to the assembly,” Fenrys’ eyes glanced at Lorcan for a brief moment. There was something knowing in that look and it shook Elide just a little, but she didn’t know what it meant.

“And she knows Elide cannot attend.” Lorcan said gruffly.

“Of course, she isn’t unreasonable.”

Elide dug her nails in Lorcan’s hand on her shoulder. She didn’t want him to give a sharp retort at the comment. Yrene arched her back in her seat, the creak filled in the silence. Elide, who spent so much time with her, knew it probably meant the baby was being active and she was trying to get comfortable. Elide’s hand flicked to her out of instinct.

Fenrys continued, “When she heard that Elide was going to be going through such healing and at the hands of her friend, Yrene, Aelin decided she would come to Perranth to visit and help in any way she can.”

“She—Queen Aelin—is coming?” Elide asked, her heart beat quickly, he mind raced with a million preparations she needed to do. Yrene stopped her wiggling and looked at Fenrys fully.

“Uninvited?” Lorcan added. Elide was too busy calculating how she was going to keep the Queen out of her room when Lynoel was there—shit she was going to have to warn Lynoel. The man was a puddle of nerves during his first few encounters with Elide that she couldn’t imagine how he would handle the Queen of Terrasan being in the castle. Or the city! Maybe Lorcan did have a point calling her out on this, it was going to cause them an increase in business and counsel meetings, disrupt the work flow of the rebuilding, and could even hinder Elide’s lessons.

“When is she going to arrive?” Yrene, the only nobility in the room who looked like she wasn’t about to puke at any moment.

Fenrys didn’t respond immediately. Elide looked at him with a new sense of dread.

Elide spoke her thought aloud. “She didn’t write. She sent a scout ahead.”

Lorcan was looking at Fenrys with murder in his eyes. He knew what this meant.

“If they are going at the same pace I left them at, they are staying at an Inn just outside of city limits. They’ll be here tomorrow afternoon.”

Lorcan growled again, but Elide didn’t scold him. She kind of felt like growling right now. A letter would’ve been nice, a request to come visit.

Fenrys was trying to explain the situation to the trio. He was being a dutiful court member explaining and excusing his Queen. It wasn’t his fault that Aelin was acting this way.

“Yrene, Chaol, and my honored guest Lynoel will be sitting for dinner in thirty minutes.” Elide told Fenrys, she didn’t have time to listen to these arguments. “You are welcome to join them. I will have someone show you to a room in the East wing, you can clean up before dinner there. If you’re too tired dinner can be brought up to you.”

Elide wished she could stand up, even if she was the shortest person in the room, it still gave her some confidence. Lorcan told her she was meant to be Lady of Perranth because of the way she could easily stifle her true feelings, clearing the way to take care of one problem before setting off into an unnecessary tyraid.

Fenrys accepted, and Lorcan showed him to the door, directing a nearby maid to show Fenrys to his room. The maid blushed looking at Fenrys, and eagerly accepted the job. Lorcan put an arm out to stop Fenrys, who was giving the maid a little too sweet of a smile. A quick exchange of glances, like a father trying to force reason upon his overly rambunctious son. Elide couldn’t tell if the message had been received, but she also knew that maid was just acting like any other woman who saw Fenrys for the first time did.

Yrene had dropped her feet again. She was the first to break the silence, “Help me up, Lorcan.”

Lorcan obliged and easily assisted Yrene up from her chair. At the base of the stairs Elide told Yrene to leave the chair, she didn’t want Yrene to have to hike the chair up the stairs when she knew she was already worn out from the day.

Lorcan walked at a slower pace following Yrene, who waddled when she walked on flat ground, but did some dangerous tilts to get up the stairs.

“At least Fenrys makes a good dinner guest,” Yrene said. “It’ll be interesting to see Lynoel grapple with his presence.”

“Make sure Fenrys isn’t too intimidating.” Elide instructed her.

Yrene turned in the hallway atop the stairs. She stood in the way of Lorcan and Elide, but clearly had a purpose.

She asked her favorite question, “Are you okay?”

Elide shrugged. “Everything was going smoothly and I do love Aelin, but I’d be lying if I said Aelin’s arrival was going to throw a wrench in the entire process.”

“I can keep her at bay when it comes to healing your ankle.” Yrene promised her. “And I’ll do my best to help you with anything else you need.”

Elide smiled, she was desperate to get to her bedroom. “If I need you to will you fake go into labor for two weeks to keep her distracted?”

Lorcan even gave a weak laugh at that.

“That’s one idea,” Yrene said. She patted Elide’s arm, and even gave Lorcan’s bicep a squeeze before turning back to walk to her bedroom. Before she disappeared into suites, Yrene shouted, “Elevate your ankle!”

Elide nodded, though Yrene couldn’t see the response. Lorcan reminded silent while he helped Elide change and got her settled into the bed. She didn’t lay down, she was too worked up to do such a thing. Lorcan stayed dressed, his dinner tray gone cold and untouched.

“You should eat,” Elide sighed, “While we discuss Aelin’s surprise visit.”

“Surprise is too kind,” Lorcan grumbled, ripping into a slice of bread. Though Elide didn’t have his fae senses, she knew by the time and Lorcan’s movements to know that Telly was coming in with the tea.

“Thank you, Telly.” Elide said. “Will you please inform Aretta and Fuen that we will be having a very important guest arrive tomorrow? Lorcan and I will answer any questions tomorrow morning.”

“Very well, ma’am.” Telly backed up to the door.

“Goodnight,” Lorcan told her, closing the door behind her. He clicked the lock in to place and listened to the lady’s maid footsteps.

“Alright, well, I guess the Queen will arrive tomorrow afternoon.” Elide said, starting the conversation.

“That’s at best,” Lorcan said. “You know Aelin. When she gets excited about something she doesn’t let anything slow her down. For all we know, she decided to skip the inn and push her traveling crew forward so they can arrive by tomorrow morning.”

“She wouldn’t rush like that,” Elide argued, though she also knew it was true. She barely had any notice as it stood now.

“She is so self-entitled she thinks she can just stomp into anyones life whenever she pleases. All she wants is to stick her nose in your and Yrene’s business.”

“I know.” She picked up the book of poetry Lynoel had given her, and stuffed it in her bedside drawer.

Lorcan was pacing, “I need to meet with the guard. We’ll have to increase our security with the Queen in town.”

“We’ll need crowd control.” Elide groaned, “This is Aelin’s first trip to Perranth, everyone here is going to watch to see her.”

Trying to stop the tears from falling, Elide rubbed the heel of her palms into her eyes.

“It’s going to be a mess out there. I’m trying really hard to not be angry at Aelin, but I also really want to slap her.”

Lorcan scoffed from his seat at the desk. He was writing notes quickly, his eyes turning a darker shade of their usual onyx, which was something Elide hadn’t seen in a long time. “Just let it out, you’ll feel better.”

Elide refused. She picked up her tea, but under this pressure the smell of chamomille was revolting. She needed to be awake. She needed to be aware.

“We’ll set her up in the East wing with Fenrys. The day after she arrives I will start organizing some kind of event for her—a parade, a concert, anything to keep mobs from forming to get a good look at the Fire Bringer.”

Lorcan didn’t lift his attention off of his letter, all he gave Elide was a nod that he heard her talking.

“Rowan and Fenrys can join your efforts to help clean up the city.” Elide actually found herself feeling hopeful at that notion. Two weeks with three fae would push the rebuilding efforts forward by months. They might even be able to clear away the rubble of the city walls, which was the largest project the city had to do. “Aelin too, if she’d like.”

“I hope she brought a business manager with her, because the requests to meet with her one-on-one are going to flood in, and I do not have time to be the middlemale in it all.”

Elide pursed her lips. “If she doesn’t, work with one of our managers. Aelin will have to head the decisions, but she could consider holding court at some point to receive people. She won’t have much time to sift through the requests, but as long as she can manage a few meetings the people might not feel so jaded.”

Lorcan lifted his paper to read over his notes. “This is going to be a mess.”

Elide sucked in as much air as she could, doing as Yrene had once taught her, she let it out and tried to send all of her worries and stresses with it. It helped well enough that she could stomach a sip of tea.

The delicate _clink_ of her cup slamming into her saucer had Lorcan’s head snapping up from the desk. The darkness in his eyes had subsided, only because Elide could no longer hold back her tears.

She pointed to Yrene’s stool on the wall. Placed on top of it was Elide’s small chalk board for her lessons with Lynoel. Lorcan understood immediately. He picked up the slate and carried it over to Elide.

Of everything they were going to have to do to accommodate the queen, this would be the hardest task at hand. Elide knew there were two paths, and both she had never anticipated traveling. The first was to admit her illiteracy to Aelin. Telling Yrene had been difficult for her, but she knew she could expect kindness and compassion from the healer. Aelin, Elide knew, was loving. But she could also act brashly, and she had a Kingdom to rule, all of her court members needed to be competent and educated.

The second option was the one she had already decided to do: she was going to continue to hide from the queen.

Elide was crying because she was ashamed, she was being cowardly and she knew it. Yet, she had found a comfort her in her routine, in her relationships with Yrene and Lynoel alike. She didn’t want to let another person in right now. Especially not Aelin who could sometimes be over protective.

Lorcan pulled Elide to his chest and stroked her hair. Neither spoke, though there were still plans to be made. They needed to move Lynoel to the rooms next to Yrene and Chaol so he could easily move his teaching supplies out of this room and into his own private quarters. They needed to tell Lynoel what ot expect, and to ask him once again to keep their secret.

Despite all of that, Elide needed to cry. To let it out, as Lorcan had suggested. When she was calm enough to lean away from Lorcan they still remained silent. Tears still rolled down her cheeks, but they’d slowed enough she could wipe them away between each drop.

Lorcan leaned over to the bedside, one hand still holding Elide, the other grabbing her tea cup. She didn’t argue when he brought it to her face, the water cool enough she could drain the cup easily. Once it was emptied, Lorcan replaced it back on the table.

“Can I call her it—just once?” Lorcan asked, his tone half joking. Elide titled forward and planted her face square in Lorcan’s chest. She grumbled a negative _nuh-uh_. “Fine.”

Elide pushed off Lorcan and met his eyes. “She isn’t a bitch, she’s just not thinking her plans through.”

“And we’re supposed to accept this kind of behavior?”

Elide put her shoulders back. If she was going to be remembered in history she wanted it to be because she wasn’t a Lady who allowed herself to be stepped on and taken advantage of.

“No.” She told him, “We won’t. We are going to be kind and hospitable hosts, but she is going to learn and understand that she has caused a lot of disruption by her rush to be a part of my healing process.”

Lorcan agreed with his Lady, and he would do just as she wished.

“We really should establish a better mailing system.” Lorcan said, “Currently, the only guest who we expected and invited is Lynoel.”

Elide grimaced. She was beginning to wonder if this was how her life was going to be forever. Will she ever not have a completely booked schedule? Would she actually see the completely rebuilt city—or country for that matter? And would she ever _not_ scramble to accommodate a guest in her home?

Looking at Lorcan she wondered if immortality was better because it gave you more time to figure life out, to get organized and settled. She took Lorcan’s hand and closed her eyes. They would get through this, and every other obstacle the world would send their way.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Since I haven't posted like I should, y'all get two chapters this week! Cheers!

Elide sat tall in Chaol’s chair. This was the first time in the last ten hours that she had stopped moving, but she couldn’t let her body relax because the show was just about to begin. Lorcan stood to her right, and Yrene was walking up to take her place at her left, Chaol next to her. Someone in the line of staff leading to the doorway sneezed, the sudden sound interrupted the silence like a gunshot. Elide breathed, watching the maid give an apologetic glance her way before returning to attention.

Elide had already begun devicing a way to make sure her staff was given a few days off after this. She thought she had been busy giving orders, rolling around the first floor on her chair making sure everything was ready for their guest. However, she knew Aretta had called in anyone who had the day off to come help. Everything needed to be cleaned, from mantles to stockings. The silver needed polishing if they were going to host the lost princess, and gods forbid she notice a single leaf out of place in the garden.

Elide had ignored these duties, instead opting for the staff to focus on the day-to-day tasks before primping the entire castle. They just needed to get through rebuilding, to make sure the city was able to stand without wall supports. Lorcan had agreed with this decree, there wasn’t enough lesuire time to go admire the nearly bare art gallery, and neither of them were snooty enough to go inspect the dust levels on the crystal chandelier.

Watching the maid balance on a ladder to do that final task had made Elide grit her teeth. She wanted to tell Aretta not to worry about every detail, the queen understood the circumstances and likely hadn’t had her own castle properly cleaned since her coronation. However, there was no arguing with Aretta, and Elide had to admit seeing the castle in this good of condition made her feel pride once again.

The one area Elide did restrict Aretta from cleaning was the tower she was held captive in for ten years. No one had gone up there since Elide and Fullah had come down it ten years ago, either out of taboo or respect for the two women, Elide wasn’t sure.

Lorcan and Fuen bustled by a few times during the day. Fuen was organizing the staff, and even rushing to orient two new cooks.

“Fuen!” Elide called when she saw him with the two cooks. The butler came over, and introduced the new staff members. “Pleasure.” Elide said more curtly than she should have, but time was of the essence. “Is Graen still with us?”

“Of course,” Fuen said. “He plans to leave eventually, at the encouragement of his Lady and Lord, but he’s saving his wages to purchase a storefront.”

“Good. Aelin will be very impressed with him.” Elide looked around the room. “Does anyone have pen and paper?”

Lorcan was passing through the foyer at that moment, a man on a mission distracted only by his wife’s outcry for writing tools.

“I do,” Fuen said, retrieving a small notepad from his jacket pocket and a pen. He lowered it down to Elide, Lorcan watching her master hiding her inability to write beyond an eight year old’s level.

“Write this down.” She commanded, not even glancing at the notepad. Fuen retracted the notepad back to his own chest faster than lightening. Elide then began to list off any favorite desserts she knew Aelin had. She kept her eyes on the rest of the room, as if she was half listing off sweets and half making sure no picture was crooked on the wall. “I have only spent a limited amount of time with her, so take this list to Fenrys and ask him to double check it. He can edit it anyway he likes.”

“Very well, Lady.” Fuen said.

“Be on your way now,” Elide excused them.

“How goes your tasks?” Elide asked.

“Most smoothly.” Lorcan told her of his meeting with the guard, the positive response from a group of party planners who were more than willing to set up a parade, and then the flood of requests from other nobility and elite citizens who wanted to have a formal meeting with the queen.

Elide only had enough time to tell him to send anyone who was disgruntled her way, her anger was sharp from the stress of today that she was sure she could cut anyone down in a single blow. Lorcan groaned, but not at Elide.

“Mister Ealwen,” Lorcan stiffly greeted the man who walked into the room. Elide recognized him as the chair of the board of road reconstruction.

“Lord and Lady Lochan.” He said, bowing.

“It’s Lady and Lord.” Elide corrected. “Lorcan is not the inheritor of this title and city.”

Both Ealwen and Lorcan stood down.

“What brings you here?”

“It has come to my attention that the Queen is arriving today. I wanted to voice my complaint that we were not prepared for her arrival—”

“I know you weren’t,” Elide knew her eyes were practically glowing with rage, but she didn’t reel it back. “Because we only found out last night. Are you here to beg that you and your board won’t be blamed for the poor conditions of the roads coming into the city? Your concern is futile, no one will be found at fault for any potholes or rough terrain. Half the city is made up of makeshift roofs and windows. No one has had the proper amount of time to prepare.”

“I apologize for any inconvenience,” Ealwen’s apology lacked a tone of honesty. “The board was just worried. We, like anyone else, want to impress the queen who liberated us.”

“I understand that.” Elide told him, trying to find it in her own heart to be kind to this man. She wouldn’t normally, but Lorcan had a hand on her shoulder and was rubbing his thumb along her skin. The Lady of Perranth needed to be firm, but she still had loyalty to win from her people, and yelling at a lowly board president wouldn’t help her cause. She took a moment to breath in and out.

“Queen Aelin will be very impressed by our efforts.” Elide spoke slowly, her mind was racing with her to-do list, and a new idea was forming. She needed to process it. “If she deems it acceptable, I will find a way to convey her praise to you and the rest of the leaders of our rebuilding efforts. Does that work for you?”

Mister Ealwen made a croaking sound in his throat, but changed his course and thanked Elide.

“I will see myself out, then. Lady Lochan, Lord Lochan.”

Elide gave him a tight smile as he bowed and walked away.

“Has this been the less than smooth part of your day?” Elide asked.

“Yes.” Lorcan said gruffly. “What have you mind for the Queen to show her gratitude?”

“No idea. But I hope she willing, otherwise I will have a bunch of grouchy board presidents stirring up unrest. I know Aelin can appear selfish, but she is truly kind hearted. I just need her to prove that to the citizens and not put on too haughty of an appearance.”

The noon sun was lowering itself, and Elide was anxious to retreat to her bedroom for the evening. All she had wanted was a day off from lessons and healing. A day to recover and rest. Instead, she was handed a huge pile of—

Merrik hurried through the front doors, panting from running. He straightened at the sight of them, and decided to forgo formality to announce the news, “The royal carriage has been spotted.”

“How far off?” Lorcan asked.

“Half an hour.” Merrik estimated, finally finding it in himself to give a brief bow.

“Have the staff finish their tasks, then freshen up downstairs. Anyone who needs a break can take it now. We’ll line up in twenty.”

Merrik hurried to the service stairs, while Elide pushed herself to the main staircase. Lorcan lifted her from her chair, and they set off to clean themselves up for the welcoming party.

Yrene was waiting for them outside the room. She had a half-frozen bag of ice for Elide, who was prepared to stop her, but the salve and ice did feel good on her ankle. The soreness from her last healing had subsided, but without spending a proper amount of time elevating and icing it, the swelling had increased.

“Are you ready to greet the Queen of Terresan?” Elide asked Yrene.

“I am.” She said. “I’m sorry if I half brought this upon you. When she writes to me she always tells me she wishes she had the time to come visit us. At the very best, she said she’d like to meet our baby as soon as it’s born.”

“It’s not your fault.” Elide said, “I need to stop being too much of a pessimist about this. It will be good to see Aelin, and she is going to do a lot of great things for this city in her time here, and as much as I wish I’d had more time to prepare, we are beyond that.”

“You’re right.” Yrene said. “Maybe I should have her tend to your icing while I continue to meet with Qwenta, that way we can all have a more productive visit to Perranth.”

“There’s something,” Elide smiled. Lorcan stepped out of his closet, his fingers working the buttons on his cuffs. “Now, if you are done with my ankle, I’d like to dress for my Queen.”

“Of course,” Yrene said. “I should do the same. I hope you don’t mind if I wear something simple, I’ve never been one to keep extravagant gowns in my closet.”

Elide waved to her closet, “You know you’re more than welcome to borrow any of my clothes.”

Yrene chuckled, “Oh Elide.” She ran a hand over her belly, tucking the fabric in under her belly and to her waist. “That’s funny.”

“Gods locked above,” Elide cursed, “I need a nap. Sorry, Yrene, I’m not thinking straight this afternoon.”

Yrene winked, no hard feelings, and left to get herself ready.

“That dress looks nice,” Elide told the healer. The heavy afternoon sun made Yrene glow more than usual.

The healer opened her mouth to thank Elide, but the gates opened and in strutted the royal carriage. Yrene and Chaol stepped back, Lord and Lady of Perranth would greet the Queen separately.

Fenrys was the first to step forward to greet the royal couple. Aelin stepped out first, dressed in a stunning pale green dress. The months apart had been good to her, she looked athletic and graceful as she stood and took in her surroundings. Elide caught him leaning down to whisper in Aelin’s ear, but she didn’t even notice.

“Elide Lochan!” Aelin yelled as she ascended the stairs to Elide. “Lady of Perranth, how good it is to see you in your rightful city.”

Despite the day fresh out of hell she just had, Elide smiled like a fool at her Queen. Aelin closed the space between them, and leaned in for a hug.

“Hello, Queen Aelin.” Elide waved to her city, “Welcome to Perranth.”

Pride shined in Aelin’s signature Ashryver eyes, “Ladyhood suites you well.”

“And how are you, Lord Lorcan Lochan?” Aelin asked, rasing her gaze to Lorcan. “You look a little sour today.”

Elide gritted her teeth. For a moment, just a moment, the surprise visit was seeming to be more and more worth it. Two sets of steps sounded from behind Aelin. Rowan and Fenrys stepped on either side of the queen, both forcing smiles like their lives depended on it. For Rowan, it may be his wife’s life who depends on the diplomacy.

“Elide,” Rowan greeted, politely kissing her cheek. “Brother!” Rowan clapped his hand on Lorcan, gripping the spot where Gavriel’s name was inked into his skin.

Lorcan’s mood seemed to lift, and he forgot the slight from Aelin.

“You both look well,” Rowan commented. Elide wanted to scoff and point out that she was in a chair with wheels, and her husband was indeed feeling incredibly “sour” this afternoon. But Rowan now worked as the Cadre peacemaker, he had taken on the role with grace since Gavriel’s passing. It was a slightly easier job, after all these males had gone through they each seemed to want to bond more.

“Fenrys has told me our arrival comes as a bit of shock,” Rowan said. Aelin, who had been taking in the sight of the castle, blanched and looked down at Elide. “We apologize for any intrusions, but my mate didn’t want to waste time sending letters back and forth to plan.”

Back in the early days of war, Aelin probably would’ve taken the offense on this case. In fact, Elide had expected such a reveal to make the queen puff with rage. Maybe it was the chair, or maybe Aelin had realized her mistake, but she didn’t fight the statement.

“Is that true?” Aelin asked. When Elide hesitated, the queen looked to Lorcan, he would be honest. Brutally honest, but honest with Aelin.

Lorcan remained steadfast, revealing nothing unless Elide did first.

“It is.” Elide told her. “We weren’t expecting this kind of response from you when I said I couldn’t come to the assembly.”

Aelin brushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear. She was about to speak, but this was a conversation for another time.

“But you’re here now, and we’ve spent all day preparing for you. So, shall we?” Elide felt extremely small sitting in her chair amongst so many tall faes, but she kept her chin up and her spirits even higher. “Besides, I know you’re excited to see Yrene and Chaol.”

Lord and Lady Westfall looked like a most genuinely happy people in this group. Aelin didn’t waste any time wrapping them both into a hug. She told them over and over how excited she was to meet their little one, her hands were either on Yrene’s stomach or Chaol’s shoulder.

Elide signaled to the staff lined to greet the queen, and they moved to collect trunks and bags from the carriage. The staff Aelin brought worked with Elide’s, the two uniforms mixing together to get the Queen situated into the home.

“Your majesty,” Elide interrupted Aelin tugging on Rowan’s arm about having their own family. The brightness in her eyes didn’t dim at the interruption, so Elide continued. “This is my head housekeeper, Aretta, and my Butler, Fuen.” The man and woman bowed, both saying what an honor it was to meet her. “My entire staff is at your service, you may call upon them whenever you need.”

“Lovely to meet you two,” Aelin said. “Your service to Perranth and Terrsan is much appreciated. Thank you.”

Elide didn’t think it was possible to make Aretta red with anything but anger, but there it was. She had flattered her, and Elide knew she meant every word of it.

Elide nodded and the two bowed and left.

“I have found the staff here very willing to help me.” Fenrys noted, a smirk across his face.

Both Elide and Lorcan reared up to scold him, but it was Aelin who stepped forward. Using her Queenly voice she told him, “Don’t make me send you back to Orynth.”

Fenrys didn’t stop smirking, but the corners of his mouth did drop just a fraction. Elide decided she would like having Aelin around if it just meant keeping Fenrys in his place.

Failing to hide his smile, Lorcan pushed Elide forward. He beckoned the rest follow, they had tea ready in the sitting room.

“Just as I remember it,” Aelin said looking around the room. “I’m glad to see this castle has at least survived.”

“Somewhat.” Elide said, “There are other rooms that were ruined, though many remain intact. I’ve met some of the surviving staff from ten years ago and they say when my father knew Adarlan was coming, he sent many valuables and heirlooms off to be hidden. Some, we’ve found, some we’re still searching for. When Vernon,” the name was poison on her tongue in this house, “sided with Adarlan it apparently came with some benefits. Such as his home not being looted and damaged.”

“Remember when Aedion broke that awful looking lamp while playing hide and seek?”

Elide was thankful for the change of subject. “I remember cleaning it up and being made to sit facing the wall for half an hour because I took the fall for it. You two were lawless tyrants, but I didn’t want to give my parents a reason to not have you over.”

Rowan put his arm around Aelin. “ ‘Lawless tyrant’ that’s my new pet name for you.”

“I was a kind lawless tyrant, though.” Aelin said, “Aedion and snuck you a chocolate cherry while you were sitting in silence.”

“Oh, I forgot about that.” Elide smiled, “Graen should make us some of those. They were my Mother’s favorite treat to give Aelin and Aedion as an apology for my poor behavior.”

Yrene looked at her husband. “Chaol, are you taking notes? Punish the wrong child, and treat the children who are actually guilty.”

Choal raked his fingers through his hair. “I could tell my own fair share of stories about being blamed for a certain royal child’s crimes.”

“Be quiet,” Aelin said, “We all know Dorian has always been an angel.”

“And my rule and honor abiding husband is constantly getting himself into trouble.”

“Once I had to help the gardener for a week because his tulips had been trampled. I hadn’t even been at the castle that day, I was out with my mother at the time of the trampling.”

“Oof,” Fenrys said, “Royal children sound horrible. You’re sure you want them, Rowan?”

“Absolutely,” Rowan said proudly. “If they become truly horrible, we’ll just send them to visit Perranth and Lorcan can straighten them out.”

“I should start preparing for that now.” Lorcan quipped. Aelin stuck her tongue out at him, which didn’t give Elide a bode of confidence in the behavior of her future children. Though, she knew they wouldn’t be that bad of children. Just rambunctious and strong willed like their mother, but also generous and brave like her.

Aelin set her empty tea cup down. “I’d love to see the rest of the castle.”

“I can show you the first floor, but Lorcan will have to take over from there.”

Aelin’s tone turned serious, her eyes focused on Elide’s still damaged ankle. “How is the healing going?”

“As good as it can, I suppose.” Elide said lightly.

“It’s going very well,” Yrene assured her from her seat. “Bones, muscles, and tendons are all recovering from the damage.”

Elide nodded. She didn’t want to tell Aelin about the other damage this injury was illuminating. Two days ago Elide nearly puked after a healing session. Yrene dug her powers in and suddenly Elide was eight and Vernon was telling her both her parents were dead. He didn’t even try to look mournful when he described his own brother’s execution. She and Finnula were sent to the tower only a few hours later.

Elide fell asleep easily after healing, but that night she woke up in the darkness. It hadn’t been a nightmare that startled her, it was the realization that she had ten years of trauma to fight through during this healing, and every day for the rest of her life.

She woke Lorcan up to tell him. He had brushed his thumb along Elide’s cheek, wiping away any tear that fell. He understood what she was going through, he wanted to know what caused his mate pain, and he would be there to help her through the effects of it. She knew he had his own trauma to deal with, so as they both drifted off to sleep she promised to be there for him like she was there for her.

“I’ll always find you,” Lorcan murmured.

“And I’ll always find you,” Elide echoed.

During her bath the next morning Telly dropped off a plate of sweet dough balls with a healthy coating of powered sugar.

Aelin was polishing off the last piece of short cake when she told Yrene, “You know if you give birth early in Terrasan I have a legal right to claim you two as members of my court?”

“I wasn’t aware of that law,” Chaol said absent mindedly.

Rowan narrowed his eyes at Aelin, “Neither was I.”

“You can’t collect court members like stray puppies,” Fenrys said.

“Okay Lord Darrow,” Elide teased. This was going to be a hard two weeks if she was going to balance tutoring, healing, and fending off unwanted conversations with Aelin.

“You’re right,” Lorcan said. “But maybe we could trade. Fenrys for Chaol and his family.”

“That doesn’t seem like a fair trade,” Yrene said. “You’ll need to sweeten the pot a little before we decided to cross borders.”

Aelin considered, “I’d give you Lorcan, that’s two fae males for the most powerful healer in the world and an elite war hero. However, judging by Elide’s expression I’d say she wouldn’t part too easily with him.”

Elide relaxed her face. Taking the defense with Lorcan, even if it was hypothetical, was second nature to her. Yrene nodded approvingly at Elide.

“Surely there is something else King Dorian would want. He is giving you two of his most valued court members and their potientally powerful offspring.” Yrene patted her stomach, a smug smile spread across her face. “I mean, at the rate we’re going, we could have a child every year or two.”

“So it would have to be something Aelin really values. Feeling attached to them like their her own children would add to that value, too.” Rowan rubbed his chin. “I’ve got it. For Yrene, Chaol, and their offspring to join this court, Aelin would have to offer Fenrys and half of her fiction library.”

Aelin spun on Rowan. “What!? No deal! No deal!”

Elide laughed, Aelin was treating the hypothetical trading of her books more seriously than Yrene was of her own baby.

Fenrys stretched his legs and put his hands behind his head, relaxing into his plush seat. “Good to know I am safe as long as I’m a package deal with a few novels.”

“But think of all the peace and quiet you could have, Aelin,” Lorcan added. “You could rebuild your library and enjoy the quiet of not having Fenrys.”

“Every single one of those novels is precious to me!” Aelin said. “You win for now Westfalls, but I’ll get you one day.”

Chaol shook his head, one arm wrapped protectively around Yrene. “Nice try, but I’m not sure Dorian would trade me for a stack of books.”

“They’re very good books,” Aelin defended. “We both know if I picked the right ones I could get Dorian to bend to my will. He loves my recommendations.”

Chaol gave her a wicked smile, “Sometimes. But sometimes he lies about liking them just to keep you happy.” Aelin gasped, “He didn’t even read beyond the first four chapters of the last book you sent.”

“That traitor!” Rowan feigned offense for his Queen. Elide smiled and played along, but she was thinking about the stack of books now moved to a side table in her room.

“Maybe I will travel back to Adarlan with you two so I can smack him for such a crime! I told him it doesn’t get good until halfway through!”

Chaol shrugged, cool and calm against this onslaught. Yrene turned to Chaol, “You know he is going to be mad at you for selling him out like this.”

“Yrene,” Chaol placed a hand on her stomach, “I’m protecting us and the twenty children we’re on track for having.”

The group laughed, but Elide squirmed a bit at thinking of getting pregnant and giving birth that many times.

“How are the libraries here in Perranth?” Aelin asked.

“Small,” Elide confessed. “That was one thing father didn’t have time to save as he should have. But, there is a pretty dedicated group of literary enthusiasts willing to revive it.”

“That’s what I like to hear. Can you show me the one here?”

Elide nodded, “I can. It’s on the first floor.”


	11. Chapter 11

Elide pushed the wheels of the chair forward, which was her version of standing at the moment. The males and Chaol stood up with Aelin.

“If it’s alright, I’d like to go up to my rooms to rest before dinner.” Rowan said, “My mate is not a leisurely traveler.”

“Of course, they’re right next to Fenrys’ room.” Elide instructed. Fenrys ushered Rowan out of the room, the two males disappearing down the hall.

Chaol stepped forward to talk to Lorcan. “The meeting is going to begin soon. Should I deliver the message, or would you like to come?”

Lorcan looked down at Elide. She dipped her chin once, she would be alright.

“I’ll need to talk to Rowan and Fenrys first,” Lorcan said. “I should go catch them, then I’ll meet you by the door.”

Aelin, Yrene, and Elide were left in the room. “Yrene? Would you like to come to the library?”

“I do love the library, but Qwenta asked me to meet with her this afternoon if I could.”

Elide excused her to go meet with the healer in training. She paused at the door. “If you can, elevate that ankle as much as possible tonight and tomorrow morning. If your ankle is that swollen tomorrow it’ll hurt worse.”

“I know.” Elide said. “I’ll do what I can.”

Aelin looked guilty. “If you need to, I can carry you upstairs.”

Elide considered Aelin. She had fae strength, which based on the definition of her arms and shoulders she had worked to hone that strength. There were few people that Elide would let carry her, Lorcan being the main one, but she could settle for Aelin. “If Lorcan isn’t back soon enough, I might have to let you do that. Though, it seems rude to make the queen, who is my guest, carry me upstairs like a child.”

They started their trek down the hall. It wasn’t a far journey, but they moved slowly. Both took in the hallway like they couldn’t believe it was all real.

“Don’t be ridiculous.” Aelin waved her off, “After all you’ve done for me, the least I can do is help you to your room. Plus, I’m afraid of what Yrene will do to me if I don’t help you heal. I once saw her dump a bucket of water on a soldier that offered his friend whiskey when he’d just taken a pain tonic.” 

“I witnessed her scream at a man who told her women over exaggerated period pain. Only Hafiza reminding Yrene about her vow to heal and not harm stopped her from hitting him. She takes healing very seriously, and cares a lot about her patients.”

“And I love her for it,” Aelin said, pausing at a portrait of Cal and Marion.

Elide turned her chair to face the painting. She had considered having it moved to her bedroom while she was confined to it.

“This was the first thing I went searching for when the servants told me what my father did.” Elide missed them when she looked at this painting. The painting was older than Elide, but it was exactly how she remembered her parents. She quietly hated that the painting couldn’t age, couldn’t show her what could have been if her Earawan never conquered the country.

“They look so happy,” Aelin’s voice was thick. She was clearly fighting back as many tears as Elide had shed over this portrait.

“This painting was commissioned shortly after they got married. When it was completed my Mother presented it to my Father by saying they’d have to have it redone in a less than a year. Because of me.”

Now Aelin was crying. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to blubber. I just—I still feel like—”

Elide interrupted the queen. She took her hand and gave it a tight squeeze. “I’ve cried about this portrait a lot. I’ve mourned them, I’ve felt angry at them, but I love them too much to linger on such hard feelings. Most importantly, Aelin, I don’t blame you for what happened. I didn’t blame you when I was a child, or when we reunited, or even now that I have time to stop and contemplate the past. I never blamed you, and I never will.”

Aelin sucked in a breath, she was doing her best to control herself.

“Will seeing some books make you feel better?” Elide asked. Aelin laughed through the last of her tears and agreed. She pulled a handkerchief from her pocket and cleaned up her face. Her eyes were still glassy and her cheeks red, but her fae healing was already working at fixing such impurities.

The shelves were really half bare in the library, but the staff had dusted and arranged the books to all be upright and spine out. Aelin took in a deep breath.

“The smell of books can always lift my spirits.” Aelin smiled at the small collection, likely planning on flooding Perranth with money for books. With a flick of her head, Aelin turned her ears towards the corner of the library. Elide knew exactly what she was hear.

Lynoel had been in the lineup of staff, slightly separate, but given no formal introduction to the queen. She had asked him if he’d like one, but he said only if it wouldn’t make Elide uncomfortable. She had wanted to argue that it wouldn’t, but she couldn’t form the words. Introducing Lynoel would risk revealing Elide’s secret. She promised she would, but admitted she wasn’t ready just yet. 

“Must be Lynoel,” Elide raised her voice above the polite library whisper. “He’s either cataloging the books, or working on his examination of the composition of a persuasive essay.”

“A librarian?” Aelin asked, now distracted by reading the spines of nearby books.

“Scholar is more accurate.” Elide told her, leaning forward in her chair. She rubbed her ankle and gave a soft groan. Aelin took notice to the action immediately. For a moment Elide felt guilty for playing the queen like this, but she didn’t know if Lynoel was ready to meet Aelin and she wasn’t sure if she was ready for the two of them to meet.

“You need to go upstairs.”

Elide waved her off, grimacing one more time before straightening in the chair. “I’m fine. Look around all you like, I can wait.”

Aelin narrowed her eyes at Elide, just as Elide wanted her to Aelin refused to take no for an answer.

“If you don’t start moving that chair, I will.” Aelin threatened.

Elide’s eyes widened, but she did as told, leading the way out of the library. At the foot of the stairs, Elide allowed Aelin to slide her arms under her legs and behind her back. Even though she was prepared for it, Elide was impressed by Aelin’s elegance when carrying her. She, like Lorcan, didn’t even pant from climbing the stairs with a body in tow.

“Second door,” Elide pointed to her and Lorcan’s room.

“I remember,” Aelin said softly. “It’s been a long time, but I still remember this place.”

Aelin sat Elide down on the edge of the bed, her eyes devouring every detail of the room while Elide adjusted herself.

“Could you bring that forward?” Elide asked. The question jolted Aelin out of her trance. She fumbled to figure out the poles, but eventually got it in a good enough spot for Elide to prop her foot into the sling.

Now that Elide was settled, Aelin went back to looking around. “I hope you don’t find it rude,” Aelin said, “I just can’t stop myself from remembering what it used to be like before.”

Elide pretended to fix her skirt, though it was pointless to try and uphold modesty in front of Aelin.

“This is one room I couldn’t stand to be the same.”

When she and Lorcan had first returned they pretended to keep separate quarters. They weren’t officially married, and both knew it was best to keep up apperances. Even if Lorcan slipped in and out of her room every evening and every morning. She claimed she owuldn’t stay in this room until she was wed, and used their short span of their engagement to redecorate it.

She’d had new wallpaper put up, swapped furniture from other rooms in the house, and made sure any art that hung in the room was bright and colorful.

“It’s not that I can’t stand to remember them, or anything like that.” Elide hadn’t even told Yrene this, but of course the healer probably hadn’t thought twice about the decorations of the room. “It’s more to do with who held this room right before.”

Aelin stopped running her hand along the window sill. “You haven’t covered this up?”

Elide looked to where Aelin’s fingers rested. “No. I plan to put a plant there myself, but I’m not sure I have the green thumb my mother did.”

Aelin smiled, and continued to trace the brown circle on the white paint. It was one spot Vernon seemed to have missed when erasing his brother and sister-in-law. A dirt and water stain from one of the plants Marion would nurse on the windowsill. She told Elide she did it so she could enjoy the garden even on rainy days.

Aelin lifted her chin. “I’m sure you can find something sturdy to try your hands at. Oh look, the books I’ve sent you!”

Elide’s eyes bulged, she should have hidden those with her poetry books. Aelin strolled over to the stack and picked up the topmost book.

“Which ones have you read?” She began picking up each book and examining them as if she had never seen them. “I’m sure you’re doing a lot of reading while recovering. I brought some of my own, but I can lend you one or two while I’m here. Then we can have a real book club! You haven’t sent me any responses to any of these. Lysandra loved this one!”

She stood up and twisted, the stack of books now in her own hands. Her golden hair was falling on her shoulders, and she looked like a child showing off her favorite new toy. It made Elide’s heart race.

“I, um, I haven’t gotten to any of them. I’ve been so busy.” Elide lied. “But you’re right, now would be a good time to start on them. Which one should I read first?”

Aelin accepted the lie joyfully.

_Tell her, tell her, tell her_. Elide ignored the voice in her head, ignored the logic behind it, and reached for Aelin to hand her a book.

Aelin cocked her head to the side, Elide felt sweat form on her back. She considered feigning ankle pain again, but she was already in the sling and Yrene would probably be upset if her meeting was cut short for nothing.

_If she asks, I’ll tell her._

“You’ll probably like…” Elide breathed a little easier, the corners of her mouth lifting to a weak smile. Aelin sat the stack down windowsill, thumbing through it once again. “Have any of them appealed to you more than the others?”

“I think the first one you sent sounded nice.” Elide’s mother used to warn her that if she told lies, her teeth would rot and fall out. She’d gotten so used to lying when she was a servant and spy at Morath, and on the road with Lorcan, but this lie made her run her tongue along her teeth.

Aelin pulled out the yellow book from the stack. “This is one of my favorites.”

She pushed the book into Elide’s hand. _Well, now what?_

Aelin sighed and stretched her arms in an exaggerated manner. Elide encouraged the action, thankful that Aelin probably took her worry to mean that she had had a long, stressful day and wanted to be alone.

“I think I’m going to have a very relaxing soak before dinner.” Aelin announced. “Is there anything I can get you before I go?”

“No, I’m all set.” To prove her point, Elide waved the yellow book.

“You enjoy that,” Aelin said, “We will have much to discuss.”

Elide struggled to show her teeth in her final smile to Aelin. She thought for sure they were rotting away with every second. With the click of the door, Elide slumped against her pillows.

Aelin felt bad for what she was doing. She had invited herself in, and clearly disrupted some kind of peace in Elide. She hadn’t seen Elide since the end of the war, business had kept them both distracted, but she could tell something was different.

At first she thought it may just be the gloom of living in a house full of such painful memories, but Elide showed time and time again that she was conquering those sorrows. Now she just had a strange feeling that Elide was hiding something from her. What it was, she couldn’t quite place.

She had meant to go right to her own room, but Aelin found herself turning in the opposite direction. The castle was huge, and she hadn’t walked these halls since she was a child—a whole lifetime ago. Yet, she wanted to see if she could maneuver the halls and not get lost, or maybe get lost and enjoy the peace of it.

The plan to come to Perranth had been quick, Aelin hardly waited for anyone to think it through. She was learning that as queen people became frustrated when she regularly kept plans to herself and asked forgiveness rather than permission. Old habits die hard, she supposed.

Aelin wasn’t abandoning her work, she told her advisors, she was just moving it to Perranth. Checking in on the city will help the efforts, she even suggested doing a small tour on the way home to other towns and villages. She hadn’t stayed long to hear their answer, she stood from the table and told them she would write to them from Perranth.

Aelin met a dead end. She paused, just one more moment of quiet before turning back the way she came.

At Elide’s door Aelin halted. It opened, Aelin was too far back she couldn’t see Aelin, but Yrene walked out and smiled.

“Hello,” Yrene sweetly smiled. “What brings the queen to this wing?”

“Nostalgia.” Aelin said, she pointed her finger at the light fixture, meaning to tell Yrene about standing on Aedion’s shoulder to see if she could grab it and swing. But she was distracted by the door just beyond Yrene opening and then snapping close. Aelin caught sight of a tall man, his eyes bulged when he saw her. Aelin lowered her finger to point to the door. “Who was that?”

Yrene hadn’t even flinched at the sound of the door, and now she lazily turned her body halfway towards the door.

“It was probably just—Oh you want to feel the baby kick?” Yrene stepped closer to Aelin, who couldn’t turn down an opportunity to feel baby Chaol kick.

The queen’s hand rest on Yrene’s belly, it was softer than she imagined it would be. She could feel Yrene breathing, hear her heart beat, but felt no movement.

“Guess it was a one and done,” Yrene apologized. “We’ll be seeing enough of each other I’m sure you’ll get to feel it eventually.

“We will,” Aelin promised. “So do you know—”

Aelin was about to shout over Yrene, the healer’s mouth was opening to interrupt her. She didn’t get the chance, Lorcan emerged from the stairwell.

He looked at the two of them without emotion, just calculation.

“Everything okay?” He asked, mostly to Yrene.

“Yes,” Yrene promised. “But I think we all need to get ready for dinner.”

Lorcan nodded, both healer and male turned their gaze to Aelin. She took the hint, and strolled down the hallway to the stairs. Her fae ears told her what she suspected, neither of them had moved until she was completely downstairs. Even if she had wanted to climb back up and knock at the door, Rowan rounded the corner.

“Lorcan,” Elide gasped when her husband entered the room. “I am in big trouble.”

He knitted his eyebrows together, trying to piece together what she meant. She continued, “I told Aelin I would read this book while I was resting.”

“Oh,” Lorcan looked at the book in Elide’s hand. It was one that had been moved about the room, placed whenever it got in the way of more important items.

“She carried me upstairs, and when she saw the stack she got so excited, I didn’t know what else to do.”

“Tell her you think her book recommendations are awful, and even if you did have leisure time you wouldn’t waste it on such—”

“Lorcan Salvaterre Lochan.” Elide said sharply, but one playful smile form him and she forgave him.

“Or you could simplify it,” Lorcan pulled at the drawer of her bedside table. He pulled out the thin book Lynoel had given her. “Tell her you prefer poetry to prose.”

Elide mulled it over. It could have worked. She had two books of poetry in her bedside table, and she could even recite a few that she had memorized. She didn’t understand half of them, but she could point out one or two that had given her pause while re-writing them. However, that was the other side of this coin.

“If she opened the book she would see my childish scribbles.” She opened the book to prove the point. She had traced letters, re-written poems over, and circle and defined a handful of the words.

Lorcan shrugged. “The other option, which might be the wisest path, is to tell her the truth. You don’t have to confess to Fenrys and Rowan—”

“Though she will likely tell Rowan.”

“And you think of all the people in that entourage Rowan is the one to be worried about? If Aelin breaks your confidence, then Rowan will keep it, and will keep Aelin in check. Besides, Yrene told me Aelin caught a peek at Lynoel just before I came upstairs.”

“What?” Elide looked at the door. Her stomach hardened, she wasn’t feeling hungry for dinner at all.

“Yrene found her in the hallway when she left you. Lynoel probably heard Yrene and wanted to check with her in case you needed him. He opened the door, and closed it before Aelin could see him fully, but she still asked about the unnamed guest.”

Elide palmed her eyes and groaned. “I should tell her. I should.”

The mattress dipped when Lorcan sat down next to her. Silently, he pulled her hands from her face.

“You should,” he agreed, “but are you willing to?”

Elide shook her head, she was disappointed in herself to admit it, but she’d grown very comfortable living this lie. Not to mention, she was fixing it. If she played her cards right she would never have to admit that she couldn’t read, or maybe when it had been many, many years, she could casually let it slip that she didn’t learn until after the war.

“Then Yrene, Chaol, Lynoel, and I will continue to keep your secret.” Lorcan kissed her forehead. “Dinner will be ready soon, what can I do to help you get ready?”

Elide didn’t feel like putting on a new dress and going downstairs, but she knew she had to continue her duties as a Lady.

“Nothing, Telly should be up here soon. Yrene made me swear I will keep my foot elevated as much as I can. Tomorrow is going to be rough.”

“Let’s get through tonight first.” Lorcan stood up and went to the door, opening it when Telly was just raising her fist to knock.


	12. Chapter 12

By the time dessert was served, Elide was marveling at home smoothly dinner had gone. The conversation continued to be light, with quips from Fenrys and Yrene, and Aelin and Elide sharing any memory of the castle they had together. Elide had smiled proudly when anyone complimented her staff’s cooking and service, she was definitely going to reward them with some vacation time soon.

“Looks divine!” Aelin declared when her slice of cake was placed in fornt of her. One could feed Aelin dessert for every meal, Elide thought, and she would still squeal over it. Though, Elide released a deep moan of delight when she took her first bite.

As soon as she realized what she’d done, Elide blushed. The most civilized members of the party, Rowan and Chaol, were still locked in conversation, but Aelin and Yrene were both smiling viciously at Elide.

Aelin teased her, “Save it for the bedroom, Elide.”

“Three weeks really getting to you?” Yrene asked, making Aelin laugh out loud. They clinked bites of cake on their forks, pleased with their jokes.

“I’m just excited,” Elide narrowed her eyes at Fenrys who was just waiting for his opportunity. “I’m excited about dessert, I haven’t had it in a week.”

Aelin pouted, “That’s horrible. Why haven’t you?”

“Because,” Lorcan explained, “Getting her to finish her plate before falling asleep is a real achievement these days.”

It was true, Elide was enjoying her awareness while she ate. She hadn’t been down to the dinner table since Yrene arrived, and she missed the fine table setting, Fuen just behind her ready to jump to service. Though Lorcan was the only dinner date she needed, fresh company was nice.

“Oh, that’s an easy fix.” Aelin had chocolate on the corners of her mouth, “Just eat dessert first. I’ve done that plenty of times.”

“She means every other day,” Rowan added before returning to Chaol. Aelin swatted at his arm, but he swiftly grabbed her hand and placed a kiss on her knuckles.

Aelin, trying her best to not seem like a lovesick girl who was careening over Rowan’s touch, wiped the corners of her mouth. The action was so calm and delicate, so unlike Aelin that Elide was half prepared for the comment the queen posed.

“I’m surprised your other guest didn’t join us this evening. I hope you’re not keeping him from meeting me.”

Elide put her fork down, she wasn’t sure she’d be able to finish the cake. The question brought even Rowan to a stop. All eyes fell onto Elide, even Lorcan’s slid to her while he remained forward.

“I offered to introduce him.” Elide hated to slip into her role as Lady of Perranth in front of such good friends, but the occasion called for it. “Lynoel can be a very nervous person.”

“The scholar in the library is your guest?” Aelin continuing to eat her cake when everyone else in the room could feel the tension and refused to eat.

“Yes.” Elide confirmed. “He’s tutoring me while I’m bedridden.”

“Ah, that must be why you’ve been too busy to read while resting.” Aelin kept her tone nonchalant, but Elide knew she wasn’t about to drop the topic. “You keep him in very nice rooms. What is he tutoring you in?”

“What does it matter, Aelin?” Lorcan asked, his tone warning her to stop.

Elide squeezed his hand under the table. Yrene was quickly commenting that it was a great use of her time to advance the mind as well as the body. Elide hardly heard, the least Aelin could do after barging into the castle was to keep out of her business.

“Not all of us were lucky enough to be swept up by a guardian and given a formal education as well as training.”

Aelin stopped chewing, the words had struck her like a blow to the face. Elide knew it was unfair to call Arobynn a “guardian,” but he was more of that than Vernon ever was. Elide had the damaged ankle and psyche to prove it.

“I’m learning things that I didn’t when I was locked in a tower for ten years.” Elide continued, Lady of Perranth was not going anywhere anytime soon. “I gave him the rooms because I felt his kindness to take on such a task was worth the reward.”

When Elide was young and she dreamed of becoming Lady of Perranth and inviting Queen Aelin to dinner the stare down her and the queen were having was not what she imagined.

“Any other questions?” Elide asked sweetly. Maybe the argument was childish, it likely revealed how defensive Elide could be towards Lynoel and her illiteracy, but she was desperate to get Aelin off her back.

“No.” Aelin said just as sweetly. “I’m free tomorrow morning, I’d be happy to sit in on the lessons.”

“I prefer private lessons.”

Rowan cleared his throat. “It is getting late. We should probably head up to bed, get some rest before Lorcan puts us to work tomorrow.”

Elide held Aelin’s stare for one more second, then two. She rolled away from the table, and everyone followed suit. They exchanged pleasantries before diverging in the hallway, but Elide was feeling anything but pleasant.

In the quiet of the stairwell Elide asked the group, “Did I do the right thing?”

She was met with silence.

“I’m an idiot, aren’t I?”

“No,” Lorcan, Chaol, and Yrene echoed.

“You have a right to your feelings,” Yrene said. “It’s okay to feel them, and it’s okay to express them. Though, sometimes our feelings get the better of us and we express them more blatantly than we want.”

Lorcan’s voice was rough, “Aelin didn’t exactly handle the situation any better than you.” 

It didn’t really make Elide feel better. One of them should’ve had their wits about them instead of letting things fly off the handle like that.

“I’ll have to apologize to her, and introduce her to Lynoel.” Elide’s to-do list for the following day was growing and growing.

“Don’t be the only one who apologizes tomorrow,” Chaol said. “Aelin may be queen, but she should still apologize for her actions.”

Lorcan nodded. They were in the hallway now, their doors a few steps away.

“I don’t think a queen should ever act like she’s a spy extracting information when it’s a member of her own court.”

“Or being hosted without an invitation.” Yrene added. “Well, what has happened has happened, all we can do now is get a good night’s rest and start tomorrow afresh.”

Elide hoped she was about to wake up and this was all a bad dream.

“I can’t imagine what we will be assigned tomorrow,” Chaol said, “The council almost fainted when they heard Rowan and Fenrys had agreed to help.”

“What was that, Aelin?” Rowan had waited until they were behind closed doors to voice the question.

Aelin pretended to be so focused on removing her jewelry that she didn’t notice the question, but Rowan’s were burning holes in the back of her head.

“I noticed Aelin had another guest, I was just curious why he didn’t join us for dinner or even introduce us. It was innocent enough.”

Rowan sat on the end of the bed and began removing his boots. “At its core, yes, the question was innocent, but the way you posed it.”

Aelin stood from the vanity chair. “I didn’t ‘pose’ it anyway.”

“Aelin I have spent a lot of time with you, I’ve witnessed you interrogate people and I’ve listened to you caht lightly with friends. That downstairs was an interrogation.”

Aelin flung open her traveling trunk and began to dig for her nightgown. She knew it was bad to dig through clothes in this kind of mood, she had a tendency to singe the fabric if she wasn’t careful.

“So now you’re going to lecture me?” Aelin asked, pulling her desired nightgown from the trunk. “As Queen I would like to know who I’m sharing a castle with, and Elide is still my sub—”

“Elide is your host.” Rowan corrected. “She is letting us stay here, likely working her staff twice as hard as usual, and have an eight year old injury healed by Yrene. If you’re curious about another guest because you’re worried about security, you go to the captain of the guard or ask Elide or Lorcan when in private. Not at the dinner table like you’re trying to smoke out the truth. Anyone at the table could see Elide was defensive about it, which should’ve been a sign to stop.”

Aelin gritted her teeth together. Rowan was right, but she still wanted to fume about it a little. She stormed to the bathroom.

“I’m going to take a bath.” She slammed the door.

Lorcan returned from his training surprised to not find Elide in the tub where he’d left her. She was dressed in her robe, sitting in the chair by the counter, and Telly was helping her pin her hair into a bun. He paused, the routine was disrupted and with Telly in the bathroom he wasn’t sure what to do. Modesty had never been an issue with him, he’d spent too much time in army camps to hold on to such values. However, Elide had changed him, made him want to not just strip in front of any random lady’s maid.

“We’ll be done in just a moment,” Elide said, her eyes never leaving the mirror. Lorcan took in her vacant expression, she seemed paler this morning. Before he could even open his mouth to ask she answered, “I’m okay. Start your bath, Telly and I will move to the bedroom.”

Reluctantly he went to the tub and filled it. He was running late already, but when he looked at Elide’s downcast eyes and felt the silence between her and Telly he wanted to linger in this room all day until she admitted that she wasn’t okay.

“Finished,” Telly said, dropping her hands to her side. Elide turned her head and looked at the bun. From the front Elide looked austere, she had no color in her cheeks and her mouth formed a straight line. The bun wasn’t as formal as Elide’s demeanor this morning, it was made of braids and twisted elegantly.

“Good.” The comment made the lady’s maid go a little pale. Usually when she helped Elide dress or fix her hair they chatted about frivolous things, and when Telly finished Elide usually praised her until the woman was out the door.

Elide braced her arms on the counter and stood up, her bad ankle stayed lifted. Lorcan stepped forward to help her, but she took Telly’s arm before he could reach her. Telly closed the door behind her, she met Lorcan’s eyes for a moment to show she understood Elide wasn’t herself today.

She’ll talk when she’s ready, Lorcan told himself. You’re late and today is important, Elide wouldn’t want you to sit her worrying about her when there are things to be done.

Elide excused Telly once she was dressed and her ankle was covered in the ice pack Yrene had brought over. The healer didn’t stay long, she was supposed to join Aelin for breakfast that morning.

Lorcan rose from the bathroom unclothed just after Telly had left. He’d likely heard her leave and knew he didn’t need to be decent any longer. Elide took him in, but didn’t linger on his naked body for long. The way he rushed from one end of the room to the next told her that he didn’t have time for her to linger either. Her eyes dropped to her hands.

“What took you so long this morning?” She asked quietly knowing he would hear her perfectly.

“Rowan and Fenrys.” Lorcan yelled from his closet. “I hadn’t accounted for the fact that training with two more people would change my routine. We agreed to meet earlier tomorrow, so I won’t be late to help you out of the bath.”

He emerged with his shirt pulled halfway over his head. Elide pointed at the plate of breakfast sitting on the desk. Taking the hint, Lorcan took a bite of his eggs and chewed while buttoning up his pants.

“I rang for Telly shortly after you left, actually.” Elide explained, “I wanted to go ahead and get ready for today.”

Lorcan stopped tugging at his work boots. Elide felt like she was moving in thick soup, she slowly pulled her drawer open and pulled out her books one at a time.

“Anything special happening today?”

Elide shook her head, she finally reached the dictionary, the weight of it seemed to double.

“Did you sleep at all last night?”

Elide nodded. “I slept very well, thanks to the tea. But, the tea doesn’t stop me from remembering everything that happened last night.”

Lorcan finished lacing his boots and stood. In a few strides he was at Elide’s side and kissing the top of her head.

“It’ll be alright.” He promised, “Don’t be too hard on yourself.”

Elide tilted her head up, and with the gentlest touch of her hand on his cheek she pulled him down to a kiss.

“I’ll try.” She said, “You better go before the others think you’re leaving all the work for them to do.”

Lorcan smothered the purr that threatened to escape his chest. “I should have thought of that. Maybe,” his voice was a musk whisper against Elide’s ear, “I’ll ask them to stay a few extra days once this ankle is healed.”

His finger pushed up her trousers. Chills raced up her leg, and down her back all at once. If he keeps doing that, she thought, I won’t need the ice.

“That would make up for the intrusion,” Elide muttered. Gathering her wits about her, she smacked Lorcan’s hand away from her thigh. “Go! We both have things to do today, and Lynoel will be here—”

There was a knock at the door. Lorcan chuckled and opened the door for Lynoel. The scholar fumbled to get his easel and chalk board in the door. Lorcan offered to help, but Lynoel rejected the offer just as Chaol stepped in the hallway.

“Morning,” he said to Elide and Lynoel. He turned to Lorcan, “Are you ready?” 

“As I’ll ever be.” Lorcan said his goodbyes and then walked with Chaol to the stairs.


End file.
